Not just another evil versus movie! Ninjas vs Vampires review!

If you’ve ever been unfortunate to see that piece of shit Vince D’Amato 2004 film Vampires vs Zombies (also called Carmilla, the Lesbian Vampire), a fear has probably dug deep with in the core of you’re very soul urging you to never, ever watch another indie horror project again for the rest of your mundane life.  No fear fiends!  Lets split up vampires and zombies and add ninjas instead!  First, there was Ninjas vs Zombies; a sleek, funny and fresh clash of two factions that never saw the light of day against each other.  Director and writer Justin Timpane does a great job with the martial art choreographic and special effects that will put your faith back into indie horror.  The subject of this review is Timpane’s sequel to Ninjas vs Zombies; Ninjas vs Vampires was with out a doubt the next logical title for his 2008 versus movie.

Aaron and his long time friend and desire Alex find themselves in the middle of an epic battle between the deadly forces of ninjas and the ultimate blood sucking night stalkers, the vampires.  The ninjas look to stop the world from falling into the sharp fangs of the vampires, but when Alex is kidnapped, the clan and Aaron must make a choice to whether risk the fate of the entire world on a single mortal girl.

Justin Timpane’s comedy stems from pulling out lines and actions that were set in stone famous by other movies.  For instance, cult fan references from Die Hard, Ghostbusters and even Twilight are in there and, usually, I would be disgusted by the fact that these lines were exploited to make this indie project seem bigger and better than it should be, but everything implemented felt natural.  Plus, the stellar martial arts choreographic, special effects that have vampires bursting into skeletons and flames, and not that bad acting helped Ninjas vs Vampires withstanding case more than one would think.  There was a slight over saturation of Twilight bashings which, I know, is hard to believe because degrading Twilight should be an indefinite highlight!

For being Jay Saunder’s (lead character Aaron) first feature film, I’m extremely impressed by his performance of the awkward, sweaty Asian kid who tries desperately to get his childhood friend Alex to fall for him.  Devon Marie Burt plays Alex; she wants really nothing to do with him but when they become entangled in ninja and vampire mess, Alex plays the damsel in distress.  Too bad we don’t see how smoking hot she looks naked, but only graced with some barely covered nudity.  Daniel Ross does steal the show with his witty remarks as Kyle, the ninja who uses duel berettas in conflict.  These ninjas are so unconventional that it adds to Timpane’s unusual film.  Ross isn’t the only actor to bring his character back from the first film; Corey Okouchi as Cole, Carla Okouchi as Lily and Melissa McConnell as Anne all return.

Ninjas vs Vampires sounds like the next Uwe Boll film (I’m looking at you House of the Dead), but in reality, Uwe Boll should learn a lesson or two from Timpane.  Boll has the blood, but Timpane has everything else – story, action sequences, provocation, etc.  The movie ends on a cliff hanger and would bring back some classic monsters; I hope a third entry does come to life and the ninjas come back to kick some more ass.  I also hope that Devon makes a comeback too!


One response to “Not just another evil versus movie! Ninjas vs Vampires review!

  1. someome needs to make a good vampire vs zombie movie & truly get into the science behind the two. i would think a world over-run by zombies would win. both are undead so zombies would never recognize vampires. however, sine humans would be virtually extinct there would be nothing to eat. vamps would turn to trying to eat zombies only that doing so reverts them to human and therefore dtected by zombies & killed.

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