Candarian Evil is Back! Evil Dead remake review!

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Some moviegoers pride themselves as being a purist especially hardcore horror fans who are looking for an excuse to bash the shit out of anything that isn’t already the horror norm. Remakes are notorious for being made and resulting to being just a money-hungry cash-in and being an absolute piece of garbage bringing shame to the original crew of the original movie. Only once in awhile, a remake will come along to excite and thrill while still being true and respectful to the original movie. Evil Dead is very true and very respectful.

Four friends watch over a drug recovering addict going cold turkey in a woodsy remote cabin. They happen upon the Necronomican – a book bound in human flesh and inked in human blood – and release soul possessing and feasting demons that bring bloody havoc upon group of friends.
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With Sam Raimi, Rob Tapert, and Bruce Campbell backing and producing complete the remake project helmed by newcomer Fede Alvarez, you could call this movie a slam dunk and was from start to finish. Right from beginning, the blood begins and, boy, did the blood keep flowing. Raimi’s The Evil Dead intended to be a frightening movie with lots of gore with very little campiness. Alvarez’s Evil Dead just amplified the scary and quadrupled the gore with little to no campiness while keeping Raimi’s story practically whole through the film’s duration and even putting little tidbit easter eggs in film much like Raimi did with placing Freddy Kueger’s blade claw in the tool shed to show respect to Wes Craven and Nightmare on Elm Street.

Fede Alvarez’s Evil Dead is it’s own monster when being compared to the original film while still being a “Video Nasty.” I’d call Evil Dead a proud and gruesome spawn based off the original intent of Raimi’s The Evil Dead. If you’re Evil Dead 2 or Army of Darkness fan, you can completely forget about any humor being portrayed here; all the fun and games will be left out until Evil Dead 4 makes some kind of potential wave.
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Call me impressed by Fede Alveraz who has all short films under his belt. I watched his robo-apocolyptic short Panic Attack and thought he had an eye for detail and the details for Evil Dead are right on the nose – the Cabin, the overzealous fog, the controversial woods scene, – but Fede did add his own. For example, there is no Ash (which might piss some people off more than the rest), the whole reason for being at the cabin, the explanation of the Necronomicon, the ending. Yet all these elements make the movie stand on it’s own two evil feet. It is mindless, it is gory, it is sick and it is fun – just like the original.

King’s adapted 70’s film gets a makeover! Carrie remake news!

In 1976, Brian DePalma directed Sissy Spacek and John Travolta in Carrie which is about a young high school girl who is constantly tormented by her peers.  Carrie discovers she has telekinetic powers and uses them gruesomely against her tormenters, and the rest of the school, when they play a disgusting prank on her at prom involving pig blood.  The film was a major hit for not only DePalma, but it damn well jump started the careers of Spacek and Travolta.

Now there is talk of a remake being composed by MGM and Song Screen Gems (Resident Evil franchise) who want to have a fresh take on the Stephen King novel.  This retake is being penned by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa who had wrote the stage play Spider-Man:  Turn off the Dark.  Aguirre-Sacasa was brought in to write a more novel faithful version of Carrie.

Here’s hoping for the best.

Unfaithfulness and evilness. Loft remake news!

Add this to the Remake Central list!  In 2008, a Belgium thriller entitled Loft has scored a U.S. remake.  Of course, the time between the original and the remake is very Let The Right One In-ish and there was no time really to the let the original film grow.  With that being said, Loft remake has pulled a Ring remake as the original Loft director Erik Van Looy will reprise his directorial role for the remake.  Wait, the reprisal of roles doesn’t stop there as Matthias Schoenaerts joins the cast to reprise his role of Fillip Williams.

This rare occasion when an actor helms the same character in the original and it’s remake is far from heard of, but Matthias will take it on yet again and the question will be will he fine tune his performance or change up the character completely?  Starring beside Matthias will be Wentworth Miller (Resident Evil:  Afterlife), Eric Stonestreet, Patrick Wilson (Hard Candy), James Marsden (X-Men).

Synopsis after break!

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Strippers aren’t evil! Stripperland review!

In all my days I would never consider the exotic profession of a stripper to be a bad thing.  These (sometimes) youthful ladies contribute to society just like the rest of us and perform a gentleman’s entertainment that will forever be the loner’s safe-haven and open ear to deaf, faux sympathizers.  Director Sean Skelding sees the pole dancing society to be the evilest place on the face of the earth as his film, Stripperland, has strippers from all shapes and sizes, dolled up in cheesy outfits, run an undead amok eating the guts of the living and mindlessly dancing to hip-hop music.

Idaho is an annoying college kid who lives by a set of exotic dancer rules that help him survive a world of undead, flesh eating strippers.  He meets Frisco, a man on a mission to destroy every stripper that steps in his path and to fulfill an obsession for home made baked goods, and they embark on a journey to Oregon, but before they arrive, West and Virginia, two uninfected females, trek with them in search for their Grambo.

Sean Skelding has a vision and that vision is to recreate that vision in a parody.  Stripperland parodies Ruben Fleischers’s 2009 Zombieland and, in all honestly, doesn’t do it very well.  Having strippers only come back to life to eat the living doesn’t make much sense to me; to have them dance to hip-hop music and crave one dollar bills as a distraction ploy has the same effect.  I get it, Skelding, Strippers are the epitome of mindless drones who seek nothing but sparkly objects, a fistful of George Washingtons and just want to dance all night long.  This concept could have been done with another storyline; why use Zombieland’s premise?  Stripperland isn’t a soul sucker of only Fleischer’s zomedy as it mocks a bit of Zombie Strippers (for obvious reasons) and Romero’s Day of the Dead (with Thom Bray as Dr. Logan).

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