Prudish EVIL Takes on the Arcade in “Joysticks!” reviewed! (MVD Visual Rewind Collection / Blu-ray)

Get Your Herky-Jerkey Hands on “Joysticks’ on MVD Blu-ray!

Arcade manager Jefferson Bailey runs his grandfather’s business like a nonstop party lined with token-operated video game machines, stocked with a complete concession counter, and welcoming beautiful women to enjoy not only the endless entertainment of the arcade machines at all hours but also to gush over his handsome, easygoing demeanor. With an expert gamer and a newly hired dweeb helping to run the arcade, Bailey has a lot of free time to enjoy the perks of popularity until a wealthy businessman, Joseph Rutter, continues to have a hard time keeping his entitled daughter away from the arcade and Bailey which he considers both to be corrupting the town’s youth. Rutter, his two bumbling nephews, and a peevish gamer try everything in their power to shut down the arcade but Bailey, the employees, and the lucrative patronages won’t subside without a fight, even if that means settling everything on a single video game battle.

An obscure and forgotten teen sex comedy from the early 1980s, “Joysticks” is a celebration of the coin-operated video game at the height of the arcade’s heyday. Director Greydon Clark (“Satan’s Cheerleaders,” “Without Warning”) helms the Al Gomez, Mickey Epps, and Curtis Burch screenplay with ton of sex appeal, a display of 8-bit gaming graphics, and a cheesy, chunky storyline of big, bad entitlement versus the small, teen-run business of fun, sex, and videogames. The 1983 film was shot in Los Angeles and had introduced to the big screen not only a few of the more popular game titles – Pac-Man, Millipede, Pole Position, Naughty Boy, and Defender 2 – of the period but also introduced a new game with Midway’s Satan’s Hollow. “Joysticks” is a Greydon Park Production with associate producers in Curtis Burch, Daryl Kass (“Darkman”), and George Perkins (“Teen Wolf”) with also Clair Farley and Raylan D. Jensen serving as executive producers.

Headlining “Joysticks” is legendary, recognizable actor of “Walking Tall” and “The Shadow of Chikara,” Joe Don Baker, as the gruffly, arrogant suit Joseph Rutter going up against the then arcading-entrenched youth, represented primarily by actor-turned-director Scott McGinnis (“Last Gasp”) as the fun-loving arcade manager Jefferson Bailey. Baker fits into that stereotypical group of the out of touch older generation who doesn’t understand new and fascinating entertainment technology that attracts young people and, as he would understand it, these arcades are nothing more than the exterminating flame that attracts the unsuspecting moth. Bailey makes for a good fun while upholding certain convictions that doesn’t entail him being the villain of the story; those attributes fall not only into Baker’s lap but also Jonathan Gries as the eccentric gothic gang-leader King Vidiot. The “Fright Night 2” and “TerrorVision” actor, who outside the horror realm is well known for being Uncle Rico to the titular “Napolean Dynamite,” sports blue-red hair, cladded in leather, and has a hold over four equally garbed and dyed-colored women as his subjects to his peculiar behavior around the arcade. Initially Gries felt like an integrated part of the clientry until miffed by the arcade’s resident joystick and buttons master of gameplay, Dorfus (Jim Greenleaf, “Evil Speak”) in a one-on-one challenge. If “Joysticks” is a film about the joys of an arcade hall that’s precious to protect from overly concerned parents, the Dorfus character is pretty much the antithesis of that theme having once been the high school thin valedictorian now a sloppy, flatulating, and overweight gamer. Another character that doesn’t quite fit into the equation is the nerdy Eugene (Leif Green) whose character predates “Revenge of the Nerds” that released a year later but didn’t quite absorb into the fold of the only other companioning misfit in Dorfus. Where Eugene succeeds, with the help of Green’s performance, is the bumbling dumb-smart guy whose innocence instills more trouble for himself than anything else, especially with the braless women around him with Kym Malin (“Weird Science”), Kim G. Michel, Becky LeBleau (“School Spirit”), Lynda Wiesmeier (“Avenging Angel”), Morgan Lofting, and Corinne Bohrer (“Zapped!”). The supporting cast fills out with John Diehl (“Stargate”), John Voldstad (“Leprechaun”), and Logan Ramsey (“Doctor Hackenstein”).

As far as in the canon of 80’s teen sex comedies, “Joysticks” fits the bill as a nonpolitically correct cinematic lark with all the goofy and raunchy bells and whistles that come standard with these types of movies but there’s something missing from the ’83 feature that doesn’t quite put the categorical entry at the same quintessential high level as “Revenge of the Nerds,” “Private School,” or “Porky’s.” The narrative trajectory often stays in stagnant territory, or in more detailed terms a lopsidedness, instead of a back-and-forth, tit-for-tat jostling contest that hardly challenges the opposition to face dire straits. Also, too often does “Joysticks’s” jokes fall flat, perhaps the lost in flavor is due in part to the film’s 40-year-old comedic gags, that mostly reoccurs with Dorfus passing horrible gas or Eugene stumbling into an unlikely sexpot to his disadvantage. There is substance in a deeply rooted character arc with the once pro-level Jefferson Bailey unable to play his beloved coin-operated machines because of a traumatic event involving a past love of his life that results in him trembling, sweating, and getting into his own headspace but that, too, is obstructed by the warmed-over objective that generally has a loveless love-interest in a mostly male dominated principal cast, a short-fused motivation reasoning for most characters, and a rough patch polish, such as with that ear-throbbing main theme song, that tries to compensate with wacky situational and sexual archetypes which are not unpalatable to say the least but can’t keep “Joysticks” from respawning after all its lives have been used up.

Catalogued as number 58th on the MVD Rewind Collection banner, in conjunction with the Multicom Entertainment Group, “Joysticks” receives special package design that will surely please fans of older video game consoles and cartridges, but the packaging keeps with the Rewind Collection overall theme that is a testament to its label.  The AVC encoded, single-layer BD25 presents the fill in full 1080p HD and in an anamorphic widescreen aspect ratio of 1.78:1, based off a 2015 2K scan and restoration of the 25mm film elements.  This 2015 transfer is likely from the Scorpion Releasing limited number release from nearly a decade ago, licensed to MVD for broader and more easily accessible distribution.  Though an older transfer, the color saturation still pops albeit some heftier grainy frames that stumbles the overall consistency from time-to-time.  This ultimately also affects the details to an extent, especially on medium shots where the action is pulled away from the camera to get a wider view.  Closeups and extreme closeups look better with tighter detail and better contrast.  The English LPCM 2.0 mono is the only available audio track.  The lossless format provides ample volume and is a real pedigree of the original audio recording.  Dialogue has most a firm grasp on the layer design with no inaudible inadequacies but can often be anemic in more noisy settings, such as the arcade where bleeps, bloops, and other video game noises invade the audio field and dilute distinction and depth.  Legion’s “Joysticks” theme track also renders palely in his cheesy metaphorical lyrics that mix sex with video game playing, even if as appropriate as it may be to the context.  English subtitles are available for selection.  Special features include an archival feature length commentary and interview with director Greydon Clark but also has a brand-new roundtable commentary with MVD’s director of acquisition Eric D. Wilkinson, Cereal at Midnight host Heath Holland, and Diabolik DVD’s Jesse Nelson.  There’s a short film “Coin Slots” which is a faux “Joysticks” trailer that costars Eric D. Wilkinson and directed by Youtuber and producer Newt Wallen.  MVD’s physical presence of “Joysticks” is where the fun is at with an Atari themed orange slipcover with boxed in picture of sex-comedy appeal poster art, a more slimdown version design that’s more attuned to the MVD Rewind Collection look for the cover art in the clear Blu-ray Amaray case, and a Blu-ray disc pressed with the coloring and markings of an Atari game cartridge.  A more complete version of the cartridge look is on the reverse side of the reverse cover art, preferably for this reviewer to mix up the designs between slipcover and cover art.  A folded, back-and-front illustrated mini-poster of both cover arts is housed in the inside the case insert.  The region free release has a runtime of 88 minutes and is rated R. 

Last Rites: The packaging alone is worth the cost of this inexplicably obscure and quaintly waxen teen sex-comedy that now breathes new life on a more accessible high-definition Blu-ray release from MVD Visual!

Get Your Herky-Jerkey Hands on “Joysticks’ on MVD Blu-ray!

Early Bill Paxton EVIL in “Mortuary” reviewed! (MVD Visual / Blu-ray)

The tragic swimming pool drowning of Dr. Parsons might not have been an accident as determined by the police.  At least that is what his daughter, Christie, believes and she is for certain her mother has some involvement in the so called accident.  Plagued with nightmares followed by a stint of sleepwalking a month after her father’s untimely demise, Christie tries to maintain a semi normal life as a high school student romantically involved with boyfriend Greg Stevens.  Meanwhile, Greg’s best friend disappears after the two trespass onto local mortician Hank Andrews’s storage warehouse.  Christie and Greg unwittingly become embroiled into sinister intent by a masked and caped ghoulish killer stabbing victims with a detached embalming drain tube and at the center of it all is Hank Andrews and his son Paul’s family morgue that processes and possesses all the dead’s secrets. 

Before Wes Craven’s “Scream” mega-franchise turned caped killers revolutionary cool with meta-crafting horror tropes of the genre slasher, there was the little known “Mortuary” that perhaps paved just a slab of keystone for the Ghostface Killer who has become the face of slasher films for more than 20 years, much like Jason Voorhees or Michael Myers back in the 1980s and early 90s.  Written and directed by the Baghdad born filmmaker, Hikmet Labib Avedis, credited under the more westernized stage name of Howard Avedis, the 1983 film nearly had all the hallmarks of a peculiar macabre dance that skated around the slasher sphere.  “Mortuary” had seances, pagan rituals, a shrouded murderer, and, of course, the embalming of dead, naked bodies that are the inevitable, natural, mortality reminding entities in movies regarding morgues.  The late director, who passed away in 2017, cowrote the film with wife, producer, and actress Marlene Schmidt who had a role in every single piece of his body of work.  “Mortuary” was self-produce by the husband and wife filmmakers under their Hickmar Productions company and by grindhouse producer Edward L. Montoro (“Beyond the Door”).

Though the post-credit opening scenes begins unscrupulous enough with Greg Stevens, played by television soap opera star David Wysocki whose credited as David Wallace, and his best friend Josh (Denis Mandel) stealing tires from Josh’s ex-employer, morgue owner Hank Andrews, the late “Day of the Animals” and “Pieces’s” Christopher George’s last cinematic role, because of being fired without being paid for his services, “Mortuary” inconspicuously moves from Stevens’ infringing on local law to surround itself more aligned with Stevens’ girlfriend Christie Parsons who feels more like a backseat character upon introduction.  Yet in a flurry of exposition with her mother, Christie, who is played by “Mom” actress Mary Beth McDonough, circles back and ties into the opening credit scenes of an unknown man being bashed over the head with a baseball bat and falling into his pool.  We learn that the man is Christie’s father whose death has been rule an accident (no evidence of baseball bat related injuries? Was evidence collecting really that low-tech in the 1980s?), but Christie begs to differ as she point blank accuses her mother, Christopher George’s life co-star Lynda Day George, being involved in his poolside death.   While performances statically hover inside the wheelhouse of teen horror with Greg and Christie seemingly unaffected by the mysterious incidents happening all around them until someone literally is grisly murdered in their adjacent bedroom, a fresh-faced Bill Paxton (“Frailty”) inevitably steals the show with this enormous presence on screen as Paul Andrews, the town’s mortician loony son working for his father as an embalmer.  Paxton’s zany act borders “Mortuary” as either a diverse trope horror with an awkward outlier character stuff into the eclectic mix or a seriously unserious bluff of being a serious horror film – see what I did there?  Paul listens to Mozart on vinyl, has an obsession for Christie, and likes to prance and skip through the graveyard as a son broken by his mother’s unhinged suicide.  “Mortuary” rounds out with Curt Ayers (“Zapped!”), stuntwoman Donna Garrett (“The Puppet Masters”), Greg Kaye (“They’re Playing With Fire”), Alvy Moore (“Intruder”), stuntman Danny Rogers, Marlene Schmidt, and Bill Conklin as a walking contradiction as a beach town sheriff wearing an unabashed cowboy hat like a sorely out of place rootin’-tootin’ lawman from the West complete with country draw lingo. Also – don’t miss the bad nude body double used for McDonough when Christie is lying on the morgue slab.

Now, I’m not saying “Mortuary” is the sole inspirational seed that sowed the way for the “Scream” franchise, as I’m sure many, many other iconic classics inspired Kevin Williamson, but, in my humble opinion as an aficionado about the genre components and how they’re all connected by a few or many degrees of separation, “Mortuary’s” villain could be the long, lost ancestral sperm donor responsible for the origins of Ghostface.  The purposeful movements and actions align very closely in a parallel of deranged defiance and floaty black and white costumes.  However, “Scream” is just packaged nicer as “Mortuary” continuously drips all over the place like a three scoop ice cream cone on a hot summer day.  Containing Avedis’s arc on Christie was nearly impossible as each act jumps and focuses on someone entirely different while also exposing the killer blatantly without even trying to misdirect or repel any kind of suspicion.  It was as if Avedis and Schmidt swung for the fences with a convoluted giallo mystery plot but couldn’t figure out how to build that into the narrative without drawing from and drowning in exposition and that’s how the cards came crashing down by unfolding with talking head pivotal plot points that steered to a rather quick, yet pleasant, climatic head of a total mental meltdown that’s much more cuckoo than Billy Loomis and Stu Macher will ever be. 

If you didn’t score a copy of Scorpion Releasing’s limited edition release of “Mortuary” on Blu-ray, then sing the praises of second chances with this Scorpion Releasing Blu-ray reissue through the MVD Visual Rewind Collection line. The all region release is presented in a high definition, 1080p, widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio of the Scorpion Releasing AVC encoded transfer on a BD25. Quality-wise, the release delivers the perhaps the full potential of a cleaned up 35 mm restore with no sign of cropping, edge enhancing, and a healthy amount of good grain, but there are noticeable gaffes with select scenes that seemed to have missed or left out of the restoration all together, reverting back to the rough, untouched image. Coloring, skin and objects in the mise-en-scene, come out lively, naturally, and without a flutter of instability with transfer damage at a minimum. Probably the most surprising is the original 2.0 mono LPCM track. The English language mix does the job without climbing the audiophile corporate latter, leaving in the wake a soft dialogue that’s a struggle to get through if you’re not wearing headphones. Depth seems a little slim, but the range keeps progressing nicely that often feeds into the late John Cacavas score. Cacavas operatic film score is bigger than the movie itself, often grandiose the Gary Graver one-note cinematography. The overexposed ethereal flashback has slapped redundant fatigue plastered all over it but, then again, the film is from the 80’s. Option English subtitles are available. Special features include only an interview with John Cacavas from 2012, from the original Scorpion Releasing print. Two upsides to the MVD Visual release are the cover art mini-poster tucked inside the casing and the added cardboard slip cover that resembles a tattered VHS rental tape slip box complete with a faded Movie Melt yellow caution sticker, a Be Kind, Remind sphere sticker, and a Rated R decal. If you’re a big Bill Paxton fan, “Mortuary” reveals another shade of talent from the late actor. Other than that, the Howard Avedis production often haphazardly stumbles bowleggedly to a giallo-errific-type ending made in America.