Evil Nymphomaniac Alligator Women! Repligator!

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Tired of trying to comprehend a director’s secretive meaning behind his scenes? Tired of trying to solve the mysterious puzzle that opens the life or death box? Tired of the reverse scenes that attempt to tell the story without having to be linear? Sometimes these filmmaking artistic techniques become too tiresome leaving you weary eyed and frustrated. Sometimes scenes just need to be clear cut, plain-jane simple, and meticulously mindless. You’re in luck because Repligator is just that – no hidden meanings, no twisted edited, and no problem solving that requires a T-Model calculator.

A classified military experiment, involving the idea of a G.I soldier being replicated to double the military infantry numbers without recruitment, has gone array as the replicator turns the strong, gun-ho male privates into brain-washed nymphomaniac women who much rather expose their privates. Also, when these women experience the slightest orgasm, they transform into scaly, mutant alligators and once bitten by one of these alligator women, their victims turn into homosexual zombies! Wait…what?

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Yeah, I’m still trying to wrap my head around the premise of this erotica laden, senseless film (if you want to call it that) by budget director Bret McCormick. I had pre-determined that Repligator had a simple plot – military experience turns women into alligators – but I was incorrect. And just for the record, the alligators are more like rejected raptor prop heads from Jurassic Park resembling nothing like an alligator. The writing is so over the board that I’m pretty sure the amped up hyper Richard Simmons wrote the script.

I’m still trying to comprehend the gay zombies; at least I’m pretty sure the gator-bitten victims were turned into gay zombies as they ignored the advances, and pretty much everything else, of the half naked women and not the male leads. Speaking on the subject of half naked women, the legs with breast weren’t too shabby for this mid-90s late night creature feature that might have once been given a showing or two on the Syfy channel.

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I shouldn’t pass on discussing Gunnar Hansen’s role in Repligator; Hansen may headline the movie, but his role is minimal as scientists telling a story of how everything went wrong. He isn’t wielding any Texas Chainsaws here even though there was a little homage for him in the opening credits. Scream queen Brinke Stevens also didn’t have much of a starring role. Stevens scene was rather pointless toward the whole of the plot, but I’m not surprised considering the film is called Repligator.

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Plain and simple, Repligator bares nothing special, yet somehow manages to bare all at the same time. You won’t have to think too hard to get the concept, yet you’ll be confused at the end. This enigmatic movie challenges all the laws of physics without even spitting out a correct mathematical formula. See what I’m talking about by purchasing your copy today at MVD Entertainment Group!

Kevin Bacon and the Evil Cult! The Following (Eps. 6 review)

Got around finally to watching the sixth episode of Kevin Williamson’s The Following last night on On Demand and we’re back to ground zero with how The Following should play out as a suspenseful horror thriller with numerous twists, baffling betrayals, and many hooks to keep the audience intrigued and drooling until next Monday. Ryan Hardy, when back into a corner, transforms into possum as his curls his lip revealing his vicious teeth – a side of Hardy we have yet to experience.

Paul: “Tie him up!”
Ryan: Yes, tie me up, but if you get within two feet of me I will break your neck and crack your spine.”
Paul: “Then I will shoot you!”
Ryan: “And his neck will be broken and his spine will be cracked.”
Paul: “And you’ll be dead!”
Ryan: “And his neck will be broken and his spine will be cracked.”

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This episode drives in the last nail making certain that we, the audience, can’t trust a single soul – who is in this cult and/or who will betray who within a group – and that distrust amongst the factions will keep life in this show. Also, the mysterious Rodrigo who orchestrates behind the scenes has me starting to wonder that we may know already who this person is and that the other cult followers perhaps don’t know as Charlie, Claire’s ‘follower,’ had stated in his own words that each member of Carroll’s crew doesn’t know who each other and that their roles were specific. If I had to take a wild guess, Rodrigo is Agent Debra Parker and this episodes leave a little taste of my hypothesis. However, my theory could be dead wrong which is hard to believe, I know.

Our killer threesome has for now disbanded into a massive betrayal by Emma’s character as she leaves her two male companions to fend for themselves against the closing in FBI. What’s Emma’s plan with Joey? Most likely her specific role is to be the protector of Joey as she displayed in the later half of the episode as a human bullet shield. Rodrigo had likely instructed Emma to escape from Paul and Jacob while friends of Rodrigo infiltrate and kill a couple of the FBI Swat team and extract Paul and Jacob from the clutches of the FBI.

Lots going on and the next episode shapes up to be thrilling as well. Let’s all hope.

Evil to Review! Repligator!

Gunnar Hansen. Boobs. Alligators. Combine them and you have Repligator. That is all you get for now until Friday!

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Evil Thoughts! Cannibal review!

I’d like to thank Basement of Ghoulish Decadence for inspiring me to watch and review this film.

Based on:

Armin Meiwes (English pron.: /ˈɑrmɪn ˈmaɪvəs/ ar-min my-vəs; born 1 December 1961) is a German man who achieved international notoriety for killing and eating a voluntary victim whom he had found via the Internet. After Meiwes and the victim jointly attempted to eat the victim’s severed penis, Meiwes killed his victim and proceeded to eat a large amount of his flesh.[2] Because of his acts, Meiwes is also known as the Rotenburg Cannibal or Der Metzgermeister (The Master Butcher).

Inspired by real life German cannibal Armin Meiwes - seen above.

Inspired by real life German cannibal Armin Meiwes – seen above.

Kevin Bacon and the Evil Cult! The Following (Episode 5 review!)

Come the hell on FOX! The first four episodes were great setting up characters and deploying a whole game constructed by the Poe inspired killer Joe Carroll, but the fifth episode was stagnate and boring that I nearly wanted to drop the show like a bad habit. I was on the edge every week wanting to know what kind of bizarre turn the show will take, but with episode five, I waited and waited and waited. Deceived we were! Subjected to soap opera drama and given less blood than a PG horror movie. Where was the edge? Where was the thrill?

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Hell, even Kevin Bacon’s character Ryan Hardy made some non-sense choices. The show begins to feel forced and I worry about the writing and where the show might be heading. What might have redeeming factor in me wanting to see the next episode was the finale of episode five where Hardy is captured by the Emma, Paul, and Jacob – the twisted threesome. Kevin Bacon gave off some interesting lines such as if he gets near me, “I’ll break his spine.” Hardy holds his ground and I like a little feistiness!

Other than that little taste of aggression, episode five seemed a bit tamed and lacked grit that has been instilled in the series from the beginning. The teasing of murder, the implied death, and the roundabout way of explaining to us how great their exploits had give them were painstakingly aggravating. Please FOX, Please – lets be a bit more risque next week!