Tag Archives: Valentine

Low Box Office Attendance Won’t Stop This EVIL From a Having a 4K Release! “Zyzzyx Road” reviewed! (Dark Arts Entertainment / 4K UHD and Blu-ray)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

“Zyzzyx Road” Collector’s Edition Now Available on Amazon.com!

Tax accountant Grant has become an unfulfilling, steady husband and father bred by many years of walking the straight line.  When he meets the young, hot Marissa while gambling in Las Vegas, Grant quickly becomes enamored by the youthful blonde with the two of them ending up in a hotel room together, but when Marissa’s violently jealous boyfriend Joey breaks into the room, Grant inadvertently kills him in self-defense.  Eager to do anything for Marissa, the once unadventurous accountant lugs Joey’s corpse into the back of his car and the two drive hours through the night to the middle of the Las Vegas desert off Zyzzyx Road in attempt to bury him.  Intermittent visions and voices drive Grant to put into question Marissa’s intentions and the death of Joey, whose has suddenly absconded the trunk and is out for blood for jilted revenge, puts a snag into his plan of being with Marissa forever. 

Infamously known at one time for being the lowest grossing theatrically run film ever, only making a grand total of $30, “Zyzzyx Road” is an American mystery-thriller from “The Kindred” and “Return of the Living Dead III” writer and debut directorial of John Penney.  The 2006 independent feature, based off and intentionally mislabeled Zzyzx Road, a 4.5 mile-long road in the same name California town formerly known as Soda Springs, was mishandled during it’s limited release by showing in just one cinema during it’s theatrical stretch, being dethroned by “The Worst Movie Ever!” In 2011 with a total earning of $11, and rightfully so.  “Zyzzyx Road” did not justifiably garner such notoriety but isn’t totally faultless it’s misunderstood essence.  Shot in the Mojave Desert, the film’s principal star Leo Grillo funded the project under an LLC with Penny and casting director Valerie McCaffrey serving as co-producers.  

As tax accountant Grant, Leo Grillo has no issues stepping into a role that’s supposed to sound as vanilla as the character’s vocation.  Whether it’s Grillo’s limited expressive range or perhaps playing Grant to the very letter, Grant’s monotony doesn’t exude any kind of excitement, suspense, trepidation, or passion.  It short, Grant is about as plain as white bread.  Being in the embrace of a younger woman nor skirmishing with a violent man in the desert seems to get Grillo out of his austere shell, even when in the final, when Grant is supposed to be elevated as an unpredictable loose cannon, the Massachusetts-born, animal rescuer and sanctuary founder can’t muster a three out of ten on an intensity scale.  Opposite Grillo and a ten on the intensity scale, for any he’s ever made, is the late Tom Sizemore at what was perhaps the height of his drug-fueled career.  The “Relic” and “Saving Private Ryan” actor’s aggression is harnessed for Joey, Marissa’s out-of-control yet controlling ex-boyfriend.  Sizemore’s unusual hand movements, long wide-eyed stares, and sneering tone provide the fervor needed for the thriller as the two men mix it up all because of the sweet and innocent Marissa.  Or is she sweet and innocent?  Katherine Heigl (“Valentine,” “Bride of Chucky”) had not really blown up yet in her career but the then up-and-coming, mid-20 something Heigl is playing a seemingly odd choice for a late teen woman, but Heigl pulls off being a candy-coated frighten kitten for as long as the story says so as Marissa may not be as she appears.  Heigl’s performance grounds the two extremes within her male co-star counterparts, bringing with her a better operating perspective for “Zyzzyx Road’s” twisting, winding, out-in-the-middle of nowhere road. 

Within “Zyzzyx Road’s” framework, therein lies a good premise.  However, the story, as a whole, has a number a plot holes that notch out and negate earlier elements along its enigmatic journey of a couple heading to desert without a game plan to bury a human corpse.  The rewound flashbacks that hark to the catalytic incident work to an extent to setup visuals and circumstances audiences are thrusted into right after the opening credits roll and this structural design is a cognitive tell, a non-linear, trope device used to say that everything is not initially laid out.  Crucial pieces of the puzzle are omitted for something that is more inconspicuously afoot that will explain the whole ordeal in an epiphanic ah-ha moment.  Penney ten breaks the film in two with a sharp snap, presenting “Zyzzyx Road” now with more than one perspective that changes the game from one thriller genus to another thriller genus. 

Brian Yuzna and John Penney are quickly making a name for themselves in the boutique label department. Penney’s own “Zyzzyx Road” receives the ultra high-definition treatment with a Collector’s Edition, 2-Disc 4K UHD and Blu-ray combo set with the restoration supervised by Penney and presented in HDR 10 and the original widescreen 1.85:1 aspect ratio. The 4K is HVEC encoded, 2160p resolution, with a BD66 capacity while the Blu-ray is AVC encoded, 1080p resolution, BD50. The UHD provides a cleaner look with intrinsic detailing mostly around daylit exteriors while both formats instill finesse with the fathomable. Where not fathomable are the nighttime interiors and exteriors that trade shadow and depth delineation for lineless and dark atmospherics under an interesting choice of garage grading until multi-perspectives emerge, dichotomizing the grading between a super flat and natural, desert sunlight to shed light. No signs of compression issues during these scenes which would be more than half of the runtime, biding its time with the cat-and-mouse ménage à trois in the desert. Practical effects mixed with visual effects endure the early 2000s variety of inorganic movement and off-texturing. Another interesting aspect of this collector’s set is the audio contains a lossless and a lossy surround sound mix with an English DTS-HD 5.1 Master Audio and a Dolby Digital 5.1. Not sure why there’s a need for both on both formats as most cine- and audiophiles would prefer more fidelity over compressed, reproduced audio any day of the week; yet, both files render a clean presentation with forward and prominent dialogue. Being in the desert where space is abundant, depth appears deeply snubbed by the initial recording and sound design, but the added ambience of critter chirping, heavy winds, and rustling of the brush diffuse nicely into the whole that barely isolates and recognizes the unique distances. English subtitles are available on both discs. UHD special features is quite compact to the Blu-ray because of the limited capacity with 4K’s size but does come with a new commentary track with actor-producer Leo Grillo and a new commentary with producer-writer-director John Penney. The commentaries, along with a new feature introduction by Grillo and Penney, are also included on the Blu-ray disc, plus The Legacy of Zyzzyx Road, feature-length discussion between Johny Penney, Leo Grillo, and co-producer and casting director Valerie McCaffrey going down memory lane covering everything from the film’s genesis to the box office bomb. Also encoded is 11 archival behind-the-scenes featurettes, an older interview with John Penney, a then & now shooting location revisitation, storyboard to live shots, a storyboard slideshow, the music video The Mystery of Zyzzyx Road, and the trailer. Outside from the inside, Dark Arts Entertainment’s physical presentation comes with a cardboard O-slipcover that speaks to the story’s puzzling mystery in a compositional layout with actual puzzle pieces with the flipside displaying no technical or credit information but rather a series of scattered photographs of certain scenes. The black 4K UHD Amaray case has the original one sheet artwork with the backside filling in the technical and credit information; however, there’s a noticeable error in the listing of both formats where the back cover doesn’t list the Blu-ray. Instead, 4K UHD is listed twice and the corresponding supplements representing the 4K UHD and the Blu-ray. At the bottom, under cast and crew acknowledgments, you’ll see both formats separated for A/V specifics. On the inside, each disc is kept in separately, one on each side, and pressed with arid Leo Grillo with a shotgun in hand. Both formats are hardcoded region A playback and have a runtime of 81 minutes in it’s not rated tale.

Last Rites: Though spelled differently from the actual road Zzyzx, “Zyzzyx Road” isn’t a long, dull stretch of unattractive landscape the box office numbers had suggested. Yes, “Zyzzyx Road” has potholes, or rather plot holes, that need to be addressed and filled and some minor tweaking with its cast, but the tangling, tangoing trio of Heigl, Grillo, and Sizemore is an amusing 81 minutes of cerebral-damage cat-and-mouse.

“Zyzzyx Road” Collector’s Edition Now Available on Amazon.com!

On Valentine’s Day, Were You Struck by EVIL’s Arrow? “Cupid” reviewed! (High Flier Films / Digital Screener)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

In one interpretation of the legend involving the god of love, Cupid is betrayed by his mother, Venus, the Roman goddess of beauty, when she poisons Cupid’s consort, Psyche, over conceited jealously with the tainted tip of his own arrows of love and desire.  Enraged, Cupid denounces love and if he can’t have love, no one will love as he sells his soul to Death in the underworld and becomes a demon of execution summoned by those who abuse love.  When the incessant bullies as Faye’s school push her too far, Faye evokes Death through a black magic ritual and contracts with the master of the netherworld that all those in her high school shall never know love.  Death summons the scorned Cupid to do the ghastly bidding that places not only Faye’s tormentors in Cupid’s destructive path, but also her friends, her teachers, and herself.    

Post-Valentine’s Day horror movies always seem appropriate as if love itself is fleeting, elusive, and nothing but trouble and elicits a bit of cathartic relief for unfortunate souls unable to find love come February 14th.  Nothing screams more about anti-love than Scott Jeffery’s arrow-through-the-heart and twisted Roman mythology story, “Cupid,” that festers from a lower fork in the road possibility of the god of love and desire aggrieved to become malevolent and spiteful in a cheeky, campy rampage.  Jeffery isn’t afraid to take on the challenge of transforming Cupid into a heart-stopping death-dealer as the film’s writer-director who has credential history of being a serial B-horror movie filmmaker with a resume of titles stemmed from myth, legend, and tall tales having produced and written the Frau Perchta inspired “Mother Krampus,” the Gorgon fueled, “Medusa:  Queen of the Serpents,” and producing that little dental-snatching hag known as the “Tooth Fairy.”  Jeffery aims to demonize the match-maker in the UK production from his Proportion Productions alongside co-producer and CEO, Rebecca Matthews.

The heart of the story begins with Georgina Jane (“Pet Graveyard”) as the hopeless romantic schoolgirl, Faye, reading from a book of black magic spells to bewitch the high school’s hunky male teacher, Duncan Jones, played by Michael Owusu in his introductory feature film performance.  Though Owusu is a handsome devil that plays authentically into his role, Faye’s character surpasses shallow and gullible traits as she’s desperate enough to try enchants for an older man to fall for her teenage body and soul and naïve enough to think that her charm passage actually worked enough to warrant sending scandalous pictures of herself over the phone to whom she believes to be Mr. Jones when in actuality is a Faye browbeating clique led by the insufferable rebellious student Elise, a role callously perfect for “Pagan Warrior’s” Sarah T. Cohen.  Jane tries to squeeze out as much as she can as the victim of Elisa’s volley of vile bullying tactics but also somehow cope the receiving end of embarrassment of kissing a shocked Mr. Duncan and as the two instances clash in a heap of dump on Faye day during Valentine’s, Faye retreats back to her fantasy safe haven as she tries to summon Death in vengeance.  This time, the incantation works and in flies with two large white wings and Roman sandals is Bao Tieu caked in some pretty atrocious facial makeup with a horizonal cleft nose, exposed teeth in a skull’s bare smile, and some serious baggage under the eyes.  I’m assuming Tieu’s short stature and small frame makes him suitable to portray the Cupid look often depicted as a child or as a slender, nearly feminine man in mythology art, but in “Cupid,” as the harbinger of death, the overall package feels less menacing and more absurd appropriate for the B-horror mockup as the dialogue-less winged villain hunts down rather easy prey using a campy assortment of atypical, Valentine’s Day weapons like heart shaped cookie cutters, a bouquet of roses, and mushy, sharp-edged greeting cards alongside Cupid’s go-to bow and arrows.  “Cupid” rounds out the cast with a majority of Scott Jeffrey entourage actors who’ve been in many of his produced films, such as Abi Casson Thompson (“The Candy Witch”), Ali Barouti, Georgie Banks (“The Mermaid’s Curse’), Kelly Juvilee (“ClownDoll”), Jake Watkins (“Toothfairy 2”), Adrian Bouchet (“HellKat”), and Nichola Wright (“Witches of Amityville Academy”).

Valentine’s Day holiday has seen a fair share of engendered horror films. While “Cupid’s” heart doesn’t beat to the same lovestruck drum as George Mihalka’s “My Bloody Valentine” or Jamie Blanks “Valentine” that scoff at romance by killing every love sick person in the room, Jeffrey’s take on Valentine’s Day stays on the slasher subgenre path, but takes a tongue-and-cheek route despite the earnest performances. I mean, really, who gets ninja starred in the back with Valentine greet cards or have their skin sliced out with heart-shaped cookie cutters? Jeffrey’s killer concepts have immense heart, no pun intended. Where “Cupid” begins to stray lies in the left out important details and the fast-and-loose character development that leaves a rancid taste of an expired box of chocolate in your mouth. For instance, Faye, a high school girl of maybe 16 or 17-years old, has what seems to be an archaic artifact of ancient black spells in her possession for reasons we don’t know how she obtained. Do we then conclude that Faye obsessively meddles casually with the black arts? Or did she visit Ray Stantz’s Occult Book store in NYC? There’s also a rich backstory, if not tale-telling, in Faye and Elise’s contention for each other involving a relationship scandal between Faye’s mom and Elise’s dad that’s only scratched at the surface and never really brought to light, but would have greatly help in explaining Elise’s wickedness toward Faye, who briefly blames her mother’s aggressive libido for all her high school problems. In what is, in all serious, an allegory for bullying spun high school mass murder, “Cupid” heavily ousts the outlier as a person lost in the fray of struggling to cope and turns to evil to solve their problems by taking out everyone in an instant. The only thing different is Jeffrey doesn’t arm Faye with a rifle; instead, he weaponizes her impulsive desires in the form of a demonized Cupid. Another character who doesn’t flesh out is Duncan Jones who drops out of medical school in order evade debt for the rest of his life; instead, he’s a substitute teacher with feelings for a colleague and his biggest prospect is chaperoning the Valentine’s Day dance. Instead of nurturing Jones’ arc from the beginning of the film, his medical background is only brought in later to serve as the needle in the arm for all the blood junkies out there as “Cupid” gets gory with a hacksaw scene that comes out of left field compared to the rest of the movie. “Cupid’s” story wilts like 6-day old roses starting to smell like rot, but is still thorn sharp as a campy, fun slasher braided with classical mythology and mass shooting undercurrents.

Valentine’s Day has come and gone, but you won’t be able to get away from “Cupid” that easily as the Scott Jeffrey written-and-directed holiday slasher soars in onto DVD from Uncork’d Entertainment and High Fliers Films in the United Kingdom. The PAL encoded DVD has a runtime of 84 minutes. There were no details provided on the DVD specs and since the screener provided was a digital screener, no critique will be made on the A/V aspects other than director of photography Ben Collins’s cinematography that deploys a better way to experience “Cupid” with perforated soft glows of vibrant tints in the most weirdest of places, like the school bathrooms, during tense supernatural expectations or when Cupid is on the prowl, giving more interest toward the scenes that might seem more run of the mill ordinarily. There were no bonus materials with this release nor were there any bonus scenes during or after the credits. Abuse love and love will abuse you right back tenfold in this death-summoning, tale-twisting holiday themed horror “Cupid.”

A Hell Ride in the Recreational Evil! “The Toybox” review!

Posted by Steven Lewis on


An estranged and recently widowed grandfather purchases a used RV to take one last family road trip with his two sons, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter to rekindle a broken relationship. On an isolated stretch of desert highway, the family decides to pull over to assist two stranded motorists and offer them a ride to the next town. Suddenly, the RV veers out of control, steering itself to the middle of the dangerously sweltering desert. The group now finds themselves all stranded and alone with a RV that outputs a strange vibe, displaying vividly horrific secrets inside the RV’s enclosure. One-by-one, the RV kills them off and soon they realize that their ride to family fun is no more than a reincarnated recreational vehicle with a long lineage for death and thirsty for new blood.

Fan crushes are a strange phenomena. Once an actor or an actress imprints their image, their voice, or their one-time portrayal of a charismatic character onto you, the unexplainable captivation never releases the firm grip around the psyche. Denise Richards has had a long impression on this reviewer, resulting in a severe case of fan crush. The Illinois actress won my heart as the determinedly beautiful starship pilot Carmen Ibanez in Paul Veerhoven’s “Starship Troopers,” one year before her anticipated and unforgettable champagne popping nude scene in the convoluted thriller “Wild Things.” Twenty years later, Richards, an ageless beauty, co-stars in the Tom Nagel supernatural horror, “The Toybox.” Nagel (“Clowntown”) directs his sophomore film penned by screenwriter Jeff Denton and, together, the pair of filmmakers toy with and present an idea of a detestable serial killer leaving his twisted soul in the under the rusted hood of a his torture chamber, a beat up old RV camper. A killer RV story that sounds to be right up horror-comedy’s alley is actually a rather earnest narrative that has a solid kill count with an innovative, outside the box villain and a no one is safe attitude.

I’ve already mentioned that the goddess Denise Richards co-headlines “The Toybox” and though I have yet to experience her more recent work over the years, “Valentine” was the last horror film that I can recall with Richards in the cast and her role in Nagel’s film as a loving, yet undisciplined mother and wife in “The Toybox” puts her at the opposite spectrum of her roles in the late 90’s/early 2000’s career. Still, the now recently re-married mother of two still has her unrivaled hots and still has her acting chops as a leading lady despite the lack of Hollywood glam and stardom. Her co-star, Mischa Barton, has been an upcoming figure in the b-horror community. “The O.C.” actresses has starred in a string of horror films in recent years such as “The Hoarder,” “L.A. Slasher,” and “Apartment 1303 3D.” Barton tackles a tomboy Samantha whose picked up, along with her brother, by the RV traveling family and while Barton has a fine performance, she doesn’t quite sell the intensity as a final girl. Greg Violand (“The Devil’s Toy Box”), Matt Mercer (“Contracted”), David Greathouse (“Yoga Hosers”), writer Jeff Denton, director Tom Nagel, and introducing Malika Michelle round out of the remaining cast.

“The Toybox” loosely aims to unravel the inner turmoils of the characters mainly focusing around the estranged relationship of the father and his two sons. The trio can’t quite shake the secret inducing uneasiness that boils inside their broken relationship, making a situational cakewalk for the killer RV to pit them against each other as a deranged therapy session to unsheathe their kindred issues. The bickering and the blaming hurts those they love the most around them first, a very relatable and unfortunate circumstance in beyond the sensational borders of movie magic. However, no matter how much movie magic Nagel constructs to gore-out “The Toybox,” a stiflingly story rears an ugly head via undercooked characters pivotal in being the heart of the narrative. Samantha, Barton’s character, has soft, buttery edges that don’t take shape to ultimate purpose for being a focal point and the same can be said for David Greathouse’s serial killer character Robert Gunthry whose RV-inhabiting backstory is whipped swiftly a single anecdote.

Skyline Entertainment and Steel House Productions present Tom Nagel’s “The Toybox” onto Blu-ray home video in high definition 1080p and a widescreen, 2.39:1 aspect ratio. Image is quite sharp despite lacking vivid coloring and going more for a dusty western-horror, exhibiting the rocky arid landscape of the pacific coast. The English Dolby Digital 5.1 audio track is nothing to write home about, but offers a clean dialogue track, ample ambience, and balance. Depth’s slightly weak, but won’t hinder the experience. Bonus material on the single layer BD-25 includes a behind the scenes of various takes throughout production, the theatrical trailer, and a feature commentary with cast and crew. “The Toybox” is no child’s plaything. A RV serial killer with the homicidal motivations stemmed from pure evil and, in a fair opinion, only director Tom Nagel could have poised a coherent film without making it out too, for a lack of a better word, campy and that’s not my weird obsession with Denise Richards talking.