Category Archives: comedy

Another Ballsy Tom Martino Low-Budget Comedy-Horror That’ll EVILLY Knock the Political Correctness Right Out of Your Body. “Fisted!” reviewed! (Wild Eye Releasing / DVD: Raw and Extreme)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

“Fisted!” is Guaranteed At Least One Laugh! Now on DVD!

Camp Counselor El Mo runs a camp of merciless sexual abuse and is driving his plaything campers to one their what’s sure to be an exploitational hike through nature but when the van suddenly explodes from underneath and a tire rod penetrates El Mo through the rectum and kills him, the seemingly resigned El Mo campers find their long-awaited plan for revenge has been circumstantially and unfortunately thwarted by chance.  Determined not to be deterred for vengeance, the campers hike El Mo’s corpse to an isolated clearing where they will cook, eat, and excrete his remains but before they can do so, in the woods is the once urban legend turned real-life serial killer wearing a human flesh-masked, named The Jerklin’ Boy.  With an angry fist that can explode someone in a single punch and a knack for ripping off their scrotum and attaching them to his mask, The Jerklin’ Boy is an unstoppable demonic evil force hellbent on destroying all in his path.  There are even giant flesh-eating ants running rampant.  With nowhere to turn, the campers are at the expertise mercy of a demon hunter disguised as a camper amongst them who was once tracking El Mo and has now changed course for The Jerklin’ Boy. 

If a fan of Tom Martino’s outrageous and politically incorrect, 2012 science-fictional horror-comedy schlocker, “Race Wars:  The Remake,” you might also want to check out another Martino indie feature filmed around the same time, a pseudo-SOV release that’s a horror-comedy with a punch!  “Fisted!” is the Martino written-and-directed independent production produced shortly after “Race Wars: The Remake: and just like “Race Wars: The Remake,” it aimed to offend all without an apologetic backpaddling for its lack of decorum.  Flagrant homosexuality stereotypes, raunchy cock-and-ball grotesqueness, off-color race tropes and gags, and much, much more lineup scene-after-scene in Martin’s indelicate and indecent return to the indie market.  Once again, Martino produces his own film, as I’m sure no other company wants to touch it with a 100-foot pole, under his horror bust and mask-making company DWN Productions, which he shamelessly plugs in the middle of the story for good comedic measure. 

Pulling form his pool of acting talent and making their returning are the Martino entourage actors Jamelle Kent and Howard Calvert.  The “Race Wars:  The Remake” lead actors find themselves out from the alien fast food and zombie-inducing drug trade business and into being assaulted and hurt campers DL and Dick looking to eat-revenge their abusive counselor.  Joining them and also trading in his “Race Wars:  The Remake” supporting character badge for a principal character badge is Kerryn Ledet as Schindler, the mastermind behind the rape-revenge plan.  Ledet does the job but doesn’t hold a candle to Kent and Calvert’s dynamic duo in “Race Wars” with their a little extra something expressions compared to Kerryn’s over-the-top and crooked eyelevel facial stances.  Joe Garcia plays a seriously unsettling and verbally aggressive molester in El Mo with other campers alongside Calvert, Kent, and Ledet in comedian Joking Jolly Rogers as the stachy Tiny, Liz McCarty as the lesbian Butch, Sam Rivas as the wheelchair bound Kurt, and Martino as sleepy Charlie.  Martino doesn’t sleep the entire picture as he takes on the main antagonist role of The Jerklin’ Boy, who supposedly has dynamite running through his veins and gives him a punch that can knock your socks off and more!  Danny McCarty, husband to Liz McCarty, is not only the co-editor of the film but dons the emo-gothic sheath of The Lords Palm Slayer, a demon hunter on an on-going fight to destroy evil.  The Black Kreecha, aka Kreech Kreecha, makes his ode to the “Creature from the Black Lagoon” return from “Race Wars” to “Fisted!” with the simply named Steve, (voiced by Tynell Addison) as the beer drinking, slightly incestuous big brother to Kerryn’s Schindler.  “Fisted!” rounds out with a few other colorful characters with Flamey the Bear (Tynell Addison), the pussywillow scientist (Joe Grisaffi), the drug-addicted blood pisser (Kevin Choate), the Groucho Marx bench perv Rodrigo Pena, and a profanity-loaded prologue and epilogue by legendary Clarence Reid in his iconic rapper identity Blowfly. 

“Fisted!” is pansexually raunchy at its core and tapes into the same genre fan-living practical effects vein to the likes of Jeff Bookwalter’s “The Dead Next Door” minus the cut-and-paste visual effects that make Martino’s film all the more special in the eyes of the eccentric and underground indie film-loving beholder.  Off the wall and off-color, “Fisted” doesn’t hold back the unglorified gags and is not trying to win any morality and ethical awards or honors anytime soon.  The narrative is also divergent of any conventional narrative by be-bopping between the rape-revenge of the creepy molester El Mo, the scrotum snatching and wearing serial killer Jerklin’ Boy with an inexplicable powerful fist, the unexplained origin of large flesh-eating ants, and a demon hunting sect crusader who strays off the path of good.  There’s a lot going on and a lot of vulgarity and a lot of fun happening here under the umbrella of ultra-low budget, underground cinema.  “Fisted!” will not win the majority over and its niche comedy and contribution to science fiction horror doesn’t distill new and improved results into the genre but if you can relax from the high-strung conservative values and be open to a shoddy veneer and house made special effects ran through a VHS filter, “Fisted!” is a psychotic ass-punch of ridiculous fun with absurd practical and visual effects.

Coming in as the 92nd title for Wild Eye Releasing Raw & Extreme label, “Fisted!” is one insane grotesque death after another and this death punch of a film lands onto a new DVD with a MPEG2 compression encoding and an upscaled 720p albeit you wouldn’t be able to tell since there’s a heavy VHS filter that creates the impression of interlacing lines, tracking lines, and macroblocking as if watching a low rung SOV.  The single layer DVD5 has a negligible effect since, again, the VHS filter puts the picture quality through the wringer but that’s Maritno’s intended veneer at a 90’s inspired grindhouse picture with the hot new tech of the era.  My only complaint is the censored tracking lines overtop the plot critical moment where the lesbian action is not definitely simulated!  A riveting scene that certainly made my brow sweat, profusely.  The English language Stereo 2.0 suffers significant from poorly placed equipment and user error that often fights the natural elements, aka wind, and can also sound a bit boxy.  With the gusts on the creek of an alligator-infested Missouri shore, ambience noise drowns out select dialogue scenes of exposition and performative utterances.   There’s not much in the way of a memorable or killer soundtrack but the sound design to match the every aspect of the special effects lands with comedic flair, when there is actually audio synched with the action as occasionally it’s missed due to the 5-year post production change of hands.  Bonus features include a Wild Eye produced commentary featuring director Tom Martino and actor Joe Garcia and the feature trailer plus other Wild Eye Releasing films.  The DVD comes in a clear Amaray with uncredited, illustrative cover artwork of all its psychotronic insanity.  The reverse side depicts a blown-up image of an outrageous death moment.  The region free Wild Eye Releasing has a perfectly paced runtime of 71-minutes and is, of course, unrated.

Last Rites: Wild Eye Releasing continues to live up to their moniker with another wild, uncouth, and not rated story that barely has any narrative flesh hanging from the bone. “Fisted!” truly fights the conventional cinema power and doesn’t pretend to pull any punches as it takes on race, sexuality, and perversion without shame or any moral high ground.

“Fisted!” is Guaranteed At Least One Laugh! Now on DVD!

Protect Yourself from EVIL Because “Tonight She Comes!” reviewed! (Jinga Films – Danse Macabre – MVDVisual / DVD)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

“Tonight She Comes” is Now Available on DVD! Purchase Here!

Two women looking to spend quality debauchery time with their friend at her family’s rural cabin arrive find their friend is nowhere to be seen or heard from but they do discover a lost mailman asleep on the cabin porch on his first day.   As the trio yuck it up with plenty of booze and flirtation around the campfire, locked out of the cabin with still no sign of their girlfriend, the day turns to night and they’re eager to get into each other’s pants for an alcohol fueled fling.  Unfortunately for them, their lost friend just showed up naked out from the adjacent lake.  What usually would be an invitation for an extended good time, the naked friend is stained head to toe in blood and determined to kill anyone in her path.  In their escape, they run into a backwoods family of black magic occultists trying to fix their titanic satanic mistake before everyone dies.

If a campy, gory, backwaters horror engulfed in occult get your filmic scary movie juices flowing, then “Tonight She Comes” should be at the top of your must-watch list.  The 2016, American-made feature from writer-director Matt Stuertz takes the cabin-in-the-woods trope to the extreme to the likes of a farcical feat many have tried but only a few achieve.  “Tonight She Comes” is Stuertz’s sophomore picture behind the cleverly titled found footage horror “RWD,” or “<<RWD,” as in the rewind symbol you’d typically see on VHS players, and has since his bloodthirst for horror with the practical effects-driven and supernatural terrorizing of a young woman in this year’s “Human” and is currently in production with a gory vampire flick, “Wake Not the Dead.”  Gory is Stuertz niche tinged with a repulsive tone that’s not just splatter nor intestinal evisceration.  Cinematographer Chris Benson and sound designer Jamison Sweet, of the St. Louis-based production company Lamplight Films, and Twenty Eighteen Seventy-Six’s Stuertz produce the film.

What’s neat about the progressing script, acutely angling 90 degrees to keep the story fresh and unsuspecting, is the principal leads constantly change hands.   By conventional standards, the young, good looking, white male mail with a pleasant disposition in James (Nathan Eswine) places audiences on that path with a post title opening of the inexperienced, first-day-on-the-job James doing his route diligently despite difficulties locating an address.  Also, in comparison to his dimwitted and degenerate best friend Pete (Adam Hartley, “The Slender Man”), James is a pedestalled prince.  As the day turns to night, James begins to show cracks in his gallantry and the baton is roughly passed to the rough around the edges but tough as they come Ashley (Larissa White, “Charlatan”).  In another dynamic duo curiosity, her best friend in Lyndsey (Cameisha Cotton) drunkenly sluts her way to the end of the whiskey bottle and toward the inside of James’ pants, demarcating the horror tropes between the two pairings by sticking up and out the perverted goofball and the alcoholic promiscuous while keeping in protagonist good graces and staid James and Ashely up until the baton is passed along again inside the trio of an occult practicing backwoods family who messed up a reincarnation spell and inadvertently resurrected a powerful, murderous demon.  Between the family-first Pa, Frances (Frankie Ray, “Bad Haircut”), the near silent big brother, Philip (Brock Russell) and the rational sister, Felicity (Jenna McDonald), the protagonist shift lands in the lap of the younger sister who takes charge in a show of no nonsense command and force that deserves respect for a role that’s usually diluted or wasted in isolated cabin horror.  Each actor performs exactly on Stuertz given script with the cast rounding out with former model Dal Nicole in her full birthday suit for most of her screentime as the Kristy inhabited demon plodding to kill in a nonstop wrath.  

Most audiences and critics will pan “Tonight She Comes” as nonsensical drivel touting a gauntlet of gore and a fixed nudity to carry it into a favorable edge with fans.  All I have to say about Matt Stuertz script and vision is it breaks the conventional stereotypes into shattered shards and uses those shards as gouging, bloodletting weapons.  On it’s face, “Tonight She Comes” appears to be another run-of-the-mill cabin-in-the-woods horror with throwaway characters and many vague plot points that don’t have an encircling reference.  Stuertz purposefully throws cation to the wind and makes the movie he wants to see, a no-holds barred blood fest geared to obliterate the tropes and only provide slivers of important information, just enough to pass the bar to the next round of ironfisted thrashings.  The story never allows the sediment to settle between the character action and dialogue debauchery, the eclectic and interesting POV shots, the diabolical practical effects, the sparingly used but effective visual effects, the continuously guess where this story is heading and, of course, the unabashed eye candy that is Dal Nicole fully nude in full time.  The other thing that can bog down viewers, and rightfully so, is the time check title cards that are supposed to tick down to the moment the demon emerges into the fold, turning the events of youth fun into a grind of survival. Randomized and spelled out, literally, the interjected times don’t seemingly match the span of time passed on screen.  What should take a few minutes between scenes, the title card states hours had passed; I’m not positive if this is part of Stuertz’s trope lampooning or not but this portion excels as more distracting from its theme-bombing track.

Another great and gory to the extreme release from the collaborating collective of Danse Macabre, Jinga Films, and MVDVisual.  “Tonight She Comes” comes to a new DVD release that’s MPEG2 encoded, 720p standard resolution, on a DVD5 and presented in a widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio.  Not peak image quality by any means of available formats out today, solidifying this DVD release a roll back to a lesser picture quality, but digital capturing goes without saying that DVD can still be a formidable format in regard to picture quality.  Likely, you will not see too much different between standard and high-definition but there are subtle areas of contrast, such as the black areas does contain faint banding and the details don’t inlay a zing of crispness like they should.  A film that starts off with a title card reading, THIS FILM SHOULD BE PLAYED LOUD… AS HELL, the DVD does the statement and Stuertz’s film justice with an uncompressed English 5.1 surround sound mix that highlights on and hits upon the important sound effects, screams, and building discordance, tumbling minor tone, and spiny synth-rock and 80’s horror-inspired score of Wojciech Golczewski (“We Are Still Here”).  Dialogue lands with prominence amongst the clatter and chaos layers that gives a real sense and elevation to the dialect of Jenna MacDonald’s tough backwoods occultist.  Not much in the way of depth as mostly everything is taken to the extreme volume, actions far and near, but range is aplenty by spanning the innocent swashing of alcohol in a bottle to the splatter of brains on the wall, from the crackling of fire to the gnarly rip of flesh being torn apart, and the robust force of bullets being fired to the deluge of menstrual blood filling a cup.  Yes, it’s one of those movies!  English subtitles are available for selection.  Special features include a Matt Stuertz commentary track, deleted scenes, a behind-the-scenes and raw footage look with cast and crew interviews with some still in character wardrobe, the Stuertz’s short film “Slashers,” and the teaser and theatrical trailer.  The DVD packing is about as generic as they come with the naked silhouette of the titular villainess standing in front of not the cabin the film in not the forest this movie takes place.  The arrangement is reminiscent of an “Evil Dead” knockoff.  The tall DVD Amaray case has nothing more to note in terms of physical prowess.  Aforementioned, this DVD is a rollback release in a few ways, and one is, unfortunately, the rating with a Rated R cut with a runtime of 84 minutes whereas previous releases were not rated clocking in at 90 minutes.  However, as far as I can tell, the Jinga Films, Danse Macabre, and MVDVisual does offer region free playback unlike early editions locked in at region 1.

Last Rites: If looking for something not too serious, checks all the gory and gross boxes, has decent practical and visual effects, and bares skin, “Tonight She Comes” is a fierce, ferocious, and fight-to-the-death option worth the viewing calories!

“Tonight She Comes” is Now Available on DVD! Purchase Here!

There’s Growth in the Darkest of EVIL Pacts. “Vulcanizadora” reviewed! (Oscilloscope Laboratories / Blu-ray)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

Catch “Vulcanizadora” on Blu-ray from Oscilloscope Laboratories!

Friends Derek and Marty trek through the Michigan forest to get away from their life’s problems, stopping occasionally to dig up previously stowed away porn magazines, camp around a fire and in tents out in the open air, enjoy swimming in the fresh waters of nearby lake, and videotape themselves setting off small fireworks.  As Derek enjoys life’s little moments out in the wild with his best friend, Marty’s intentions are more focused on their unspoken pact, the whole reason for their journey through isolated wilderness.  The closer they walked toward to their journey’s terminus, Marty’s determination to finish what they started becomes more rabid whereas Derek has second thoughts with fear projecting out of his nervous habits.  When one of them doesn’t return home, tremendous guilt submerses the other into self-liability as he tries to make right and to make amends for what happened between the two friends alone in the wilderness.

Vulcanizadora.  A Spanish dictionary word for tire shop or also the heat-treating process of crude rubber to improve durability.  It’s also the title of Michigan native Joel Potrykus’s written-and-directed, 2024 dark comedy drama that relates, in a way, to both English definitions of the word.  Potrykus began his directing career in comedy back in 2012 with “Ape,” a black comedy about a struggling comedian-turned-pyromaniac, and from there the residing Grand Rapids filmmaker has hovered in the bleak and comedic mingle continuing with the ill-fitted paranoia of “Buzzard,” fortune obsessed mysteries of “The Alchemist Cookbook,” and “Relaxer” that takes audiences, or at least those who lived through the experience, back to the Y2K apocalypse scare for one man’s quest to conquer the Pac-Man videogame.  “Vulcanizadora” is a produced by Hannah Dweck and Theodore Schaefer of Dweck Productions, Matt Grady of Factory 25, and Ashley and Joel Potrykus under Sob Noise Productions. 

Joel Potrykus co-stars in his own feature story alongside Potrykus film regular Joshua Burge in their first collaboration since 2018’s “Relaxer,” marking their fourth project together.  Potrykus plays the incessantly hyperactive Derek, a babbling, balding, and large goatee rocking fun seeker eager to show Marty a good time on their walk through the woods despite the grim preconceived end game.  Marty’s a direct opposite of Derek with solemn character and intensive tinkerer putting up with Derek’s nervous ways but also impatiently awaiting their determined fate.  Potrykus constructs a fascinating and fantastic preluding invisible wall with the intention of blocking both Derek and Marty’s past and chiseling out piece-by-piece under casually cryptic conversation, we can begin to learn what motivates their pact with hints of property destructive transgressions and life disaffirming unhappiness.  There’s never clearcut cause upfront or even into the second act and that naturally leaves the last act to unravel the unfortunate circumstances around what makes Joel and Marty tick, and their friendship acutely grows stronger with compassion and genuine regard despite the other’s permanent absence.  The story primarily and innately focuses on the buddy duo, that appears under the guise of the arbitrary mundane with one-sided indulgence in Derek’s childlike Incessancy and quiet Marty’s tongue-biting abiding of his friend’s then unknown stall tactics, but the narrative opens up and expands upon “Vulcanizadora’s” world as one of them reinstates themselves back into their personal misery, a smalltown society of unscrupulous lawyers, browbeating and demented fathers, challenging ex-wives, and intimidating authoritative figures casted with Bill Vincent, Sherryl Despress, Scott Ayotte, Dennis Grants, G. Foster II, Jaz Edwards, Melissa Blanchard, and introducing Solo Potrykus. 

A slow burn of melancholy, “Vulcanizadora” is masked depression at its worst with voiceless victims that work out an ill-fated end on their own.  “Vulcanizadora” is also about friendship despite the seemingly lopsided larking and crestfallen relationship between Derek and Marty, who often feel more like diamagnetism than having a connection while on their passage through the woods.  Potrykus’s story, and subsequent exhibition of the tale, depicts an all but true tragedy of feeling the impact of loss, especially in the context of underappreciated and compassionate feelings for someone else.  While the other friend is around, complacency is the devil’s active ingredient in dividing our human connection as the thought is both being alive together or dead together would be constant, and even more so when that connection is with a person who might be the best person in the world to them but just can’t see underneath the film of one’s own miscontent.  When not around, being separated makes the heart grow founder and the reality of loss sets in.  Potrykus highlights those forlorn facets in the third act surrounded by nothing of life’s hardships and unusual bombardments, which to be fair was brought upon by past transgressions of invincibility, which involve a process similar to vulcanizing, hence the title, and the knowledge that it’ll all over soon.  Yet, there’s also a sort of vulcanizing of the friendship elasticity and durability even in post-“breakup” of the friendship to create an everlasting peace with all the bad that’s happened.

Oscilloscope Laboratories, an indie label curating the filmic curiosities, releases “Vulcanizadora” to Blu-ray home video with an AVC encoded, 1080p Hi-Def resolution, BD25, presented curiously in an European widescreen 1.66:1aspect ratio, a standard proportion display you usually would primarily see in 1960s-1980s Europe with a slightly boxed and bordered matte.  A satisfiable picture for a character-driven slow burn aimed to build and destruct to build again a relationship between two friends during a time of individualized darkness is not a picture of perfection where certain areas inside the forest are out of focus and indistinct, such as the blending of orange and brown leaves on the ground in very long shots while capturing the principals traversing through.  Likely more of an issue with the cinematography than in compression because Potrykus uses 16mm to evoke a richer texture, “Vulcanizadora” is not a high-powered, action-packed thriller or sensational visual drama to be affected by it’s off-and-on focus.  Details are generally better around close-to-medium shot textures, skin tones appear organically accurate, and there’s decent depth of field inside a naturally limited color range.  There are some good close ups that do deviate, such as in a gorier graphic shot that impales more intrusive grain into the cell, in what is perhaps a limitation of 16mm zoomed in.  There are often indiscernible blips in the film stock because of its newer production but the grain, when not extended, is organic with an enriching natural aesthetic.  The English DTS-HD 5.1 surround sound is more than enough to cover all audio aspects from a precisely clear and clean dialogue to a Sasa Slogar’s sound design of comping operatic harmonies of soprano Maria Callas with the rough heavy metal soundscape of the Brazillian band Sepultura.  Dialogue retains in the forefront even in long shots when characters are at far points in the scene denoting an omission of depth in what is mostly a medium-to-close shot narrative.  English subtitles are optionally available.  Joel Potrykus, Joshua Burge, and cinematographer Adam J. Minnick provide an audio commentary track parallel to the feature with a making-of “Vulcanizadora,” deleted scenes, the theatrical trailer, and Potrykus’s short film, “Pets” to fill out the special features.  Oscilloscope Laboratories release comes in a clear Viva case with an unsettling yet telling death and video image in its cyborg-esque edge cover art and a reverse cover honed-in on a still image of the two protagonists.  Disc comes company typical pressed with the company logo large and in charge at the center and film title hovering over top.  The not rated release has a runtime of 85 minutes and is suitable for all region playback.

Last Rites: Few will relish in Potrykus’s “Vulcanizadora’s” slow-and-steady tragedy of deep depression and the crawling out of the fiasco unfolded, self-dug hole to find some sliver of peace and comfort in doing one right thing for a friend.

Catch “Vulcanizadora” on Blu-ray from Oscilloscope Laboratories!

An EVIL Drug That Can Cure Your Crabs and Boil Your Insides! “Private Blue” (SRS Cinema / DVD)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

“Private Blue” is on the case! DVD Now Available.

A new drug is on the streets of Edmonton, Alberta.  Call Shrink, the drug can produce a massive high and contains a high level of antivirals that can cure any sexually transmitted disease, but there’s a side effect.  If taken in a single excess amount, the drug can boil your insides, leaving nothing left.  The Edmonton police are stuck on the case with no leads and to make progress on the fast-moving drug epidemic that has now claimed the life of a daughter of a prominent sports booky, the department hires Tony Blue, an ex-cop now private investigator who can use unconventional means outside the scope of police authority to get the needed information, such as where Shrink is being peddled and produced.  Working down the vine, Blue runs through the hierarchy from street pushers to the manufacturing kingpin, a brusque and brutish strip club owner named Wanda who will stop at nothing and will not let anyone get in her way to fill the streets with her deadly, venereal disease-curing drug.

A comedic spin on the 1980’s lone wolf cop-thriller, “Private Blue” immerses itself into every trope manageable inside its indie budget with business in the front, party in the back mullets, bad guy chases and beatdowns, and a smoke-filled and color gel-brightened assortment of atmospheres that propagates the cop film neo noir aspects.  The accountable party behind this crass cop caper are a pair of brothers, Devin and Robert Burkosky, based in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.  The brothers produce, write, direct, and one-half star in what is their sophomore feature film behind the 2018 comedy-horror “Load Shark Massacre” that’s about a murderous loan shark who bites off more than he can chew.  Continuing the trend of drugs, violence, and psychotronic absurdities, “Private Blue” is an extension of their creative effort into crime action with a horror edge but with this time, they add a science-fiction element straight out of the boondocks of left field.   The feature is produced under the Burkosky company, Beechmont Entertainment. 

Robert Burkosky jumps into the titular role of “Private Blue” as a wisecracking and arrogant Tony Blue, an expelled detective because of his purloining of the evidence locker for his own needs, but Blue is a great chase-down detective, if not the best with his quick wit and adept situational skillset that makes him valuable.  Burkosky hams up Blue’s cocky attitude and Miami Vice-lite dress with linen blazer overtop a white tank top, sporting aviator glasses, and flaunting a greasy-looking mullet to accentuate the arrogance and confidence.  Opposite Burkosky is Moira MacKinnon as the larger-than-life adult industry head honcho and criminal mastermind Wanda who’s behind the manufacturing and distribution of the Shrink drug.  Having had a role in the Burkosky’s debut feature “Loan Shark Massacre” and was recently in their last film, the 2025 “Heat Score” that’s currently in post-production, MacKinnon’s a Burkosky go-to regular and her performance in “Private Blue” is perhaps my personal favorite with the Rita from “Power Rangers” voice and cackle and a maniacally expressed face as she bulldozes people into what she wants, no matter friend or foe.  “Private Blue’s” colorful cast doesn’t end there as there’s plenty of outrageous personalizes that are typical of a Burkosky brothers production, such as Tommy Grimes in drag playing the role of a female assigned stripper named Candy, Wolfgang Johnson as a low-level, guitar-playing, drug pusher, and Rod Wolfe as an older, mid-level dealer who wears various peppers around his neck like a necklace.  Dean Lonsdale, Ian Rowley, Dave Qurik, Kaley Leblanc, Jesse Hicks, Arielle McCuaig, Christian Stahl, and Brandi Strauss fill out the cast.

For what the Burkosky’s try to achieve in churning out “Private Blue” as a throwback of hard-boiled sleuth work, there’s success is select areas.  One of those successful portions is the phenomenally pastiche 80’s soundtrack by Robert Burkosky and the general aesthetic of the said decade with smoke-filled room illuminated by the gel lighting.  Wardrobing occasionally lands in the same era but there’s really no set point in time the story takes place but rather a mishmash of decades.  Devin and Robert, the latter quickly establishing himself as nearly a one-man show for the entire production, are competent editors that make “Private Blue” an easily digestible narrative.  What’s not easily digestible are the jokes that, for the most part, land flat.  The colorful characters do indeed entertain in their ineloquence and idiosyncrasies, but the script lacks that gut punch humor.  Instead, the script is riddled with fart gags, which personally I’m not a terrible fan of its audiological stink, and the jokes continue periodically throughout in every, or every other, scene of just randomized farting when a character sits, squats, or actually flatulates purposefully as a way of gag-inducing defense.  While most jokes don’t jive in jest, there are a handful that do, such as Tommy Grimes convincing our sexuality as dolled up sex worker Candy or Robert Burkosky’s lengthy slow-motion dance scene with a bunch of strippers at Wanda’s club.  Hilarity, as well as spurts of graphic violence, continue through whenever the story perversely changes course and mostly for the better. 

“Private Blue” is on the case.  Or, rather, is inside the case of an DVD Amaray with the release from ultra-indie underground label SRS Cinema.  The MPEG-2 encoded, standard definition 420p, DVD-R with the purple underbelly has a less-than-desired picture quality that’s par for the course with SRS Cinema.  Yet, all the sub-def eyesores are not terribly off-putting thanks to some decent camera equipment and know-how by the Burkoskys.  The palatable image has a flat grading only targeting contrast during it gel-lit scenes and the film is presented in 1.33:1 full screen that’s shot-on-videotape with uniform moments of interlacing.  Imaging produced is a result of a macro lens, encompassing even less within the standard framing and providing a flatter field that loses a bit of the depth.  The LPCM stereo mix that offers an ample dialogue track and range of audio layers that create a fair separation.  Robert Burkosky’s soundtrack epitomizes the balance between the layers when amplifying to make it the star of the scene.  Gun shots, thrown punches, and, even to an extent, the fart gags find the relative right level within a campy mix.  English captioning is available on this DVD.  Special features include a paralleling director’s commentary track, a blooper and outtake reel, the film’s trailer, and other SRS Cinema trailers.  SRS Cinema’s physical copy is standard fair but does showcase a blue-hued illustrative artwork that’s appealing and accurate with the same, but cropped, design pressed on the disc.  The 96-minute film comes not rated and is region free.

Last Rites: A debased tribute to the hard-boiled 80’s cop actioner, The Burkosky Brothers “Private Blue” has potential to be a great accolade of the subgenre as well as be funny but falls short with an overuse of pass gas gags and its inability to surpass that tenor.

“Private Blue” is on the case! DVD Now Available.

White Space Men are the EVIL Captains of the Zombie-inducing Slave Trade and Intergalactic Fast-Food Industry! “Race War: The Remake” reviewed! (Wild Eye Releasing: Raw & Extreme / DVD)

Posted by Steven Lewis on

Get Caught Up in the Middle of a “Race War: The Rmeake” on DVD

Drug dealer Baking Soda is feeling the peddling pangs of dropped traffic for his crystal pure PCP.  With no one buying his smack, he and his friend G.E.D. reside back home to drink with their close fish-headed friend Kreech and sleep off the day’s failure to try again tomorrow.  Their persistence to sell puts them on the radar of a white supremacy group vending a new drug on the street, the cause for Baking Soda’s drop in sales, but their product isn’t just going to get users high, it will turn them into flesh-eating zombie slaves.  When G.E.D. is kidnapped by the group, Baking Soda and Krrech have to run through the list of suspects – Jews, Hispanics, Chinese, and others – for the source of his sale woes and to rescue his friend, guns blazing if necessary or if unnecessary, but there may be more extraterrestrial motives that haven’t yet been unearthed. 

“Race War: The Remake” is a 2012 politically incorrect, ultra-offensive spoof comedy and blaxploitation horror from writer-director Tom Martino.  A Tom Savini school graduate, te special effects artist Martino (“Dead of Knight,” “Return to Nuke ‘Em High Volume 1,” “Doll Factory”) takes helm in the director’s chair for his debut in indie feature productions with one of the wildest, crudest, and tactlessly funny comedy-horrors I’ve seen since Troma’s “The Taint.”  Set in and around Houston, Texas and the greater surrounding area with guerrilla filming in locations such as the Houston Space Center and shooting with permission at the Darke Institute’s Phobia Haunted House, “Race War:  The Remake” doesn’t have an originating film despite the title in what is considered a spoof sequel – think of examples “Dude Bro Massacre III” and it’s standalone release or the non-existent second sequel between  “Thankskilling” and “Thankskilling III.”  Martino produces his own work under his outside of Houston-based company DWN Productions that doubles in making horror theme masks, busts, and props.

Thick-skinned actors comfortable with the narrative’s uncomfortable themes begin with Howard Calvert and Jamelle Kent as Baking Soda and G.E.D.  Calbert and Kent have become regulars in the Tom Martino catalogue of cast members for his more recent films and their humble beginnings in “Race War:  The Remake” proved their longevity to stay with the director, who is white, who wrote extensive race, gender, sexuality, and fart jokes in the context of a comedy-horror with cringy stereotypes and genuine tributes.  Calvert and Kent have great comedic timing to pull off all the zany editing, sound bites, and practical effects distaste Martino has flaming axe tosses at them to achieve his vision.  The two are joined by Danny McCarty, who would become another regular and be the visual effects supervisor for the film, dressed head-to-toe in loose-fitting urban attire to match the theme of Calvert and Kent’s black A-shirt and do-rags but his hands and face are masked to become the Creature from the Black Lagoon, aka Kreech.  Martino’s “Race War:  The Remake” isn’t just about the terrestrial races but intergalactic ones as well and we soon see that later on with the intentions of neo-Nazi white drug suppliers, led by Matt Rogers’ vulgarity in the horseshoe mustached Tex.  There are various other encountered gross stereotypes in the trio’s urban quest, such as a large nosed, greedy Jewish lawyer, Mexican luchador bodyguards, and a Pai Mei-esque Shifu speaking gibberish har har sounds and listing off popular Americanized Chinese dishes in attempt to be derogatorily funny.  With a film titled as “Race Wars:  The Remake,” the cast is mostly white and black actors poking uncouth fun with a big unconcerned and insensitive stick with Corey Fuller, Kerryn Ledet, Sam Rivas, and Coady Allen listed in the cast.

“Race Wars:  The Remake” isn’t funny, it’s stupid funny!  Having grown up in the 1980-2000s, consciously I might add, Martino’s politically incorrect and his brand of juvenile humor resonates with me, reminding me how cinema has become numb to the spoof humor.  Granted, Martino’s humor is over the top cutting, gross, and full of jest bigotry, traits that would trigger many in today’s sensitive awareness, and while cringy after a tasteless joke may result, there’ll likely be some a side of the mouth chuckle to go along with it.  On the opposite side of the spectrum, Martino tributes to references of certain popular culture icons, though slightly bastardizing some for laughs.  From Peter Jackson’s “Bad Taste,” to “Creature from the Black Lagoon,” to even “Mortal Kombat,” “Race Wars: The Remake” integrates the best parts of each these staples of pop culture and that gives his film a leg up on other offensive spoofs of the same crass caliber.  Th one negative story structure item to  highlight is the act one narrative takes a while to work the gears and get going as it attempts to setup the 40oz-drinking chumminess of Baking Soda, G.E.D., and Kreech but lags to a stagnant stall for hot second while still surround with the here-and-there gags, themed with G.E.D. homosexual tendencies and Baking Soda’s drug peddling woes on and off the streets, but once the antics pickup, there’s no stopping Martino and his filmic entourage from raining down an assault of insults. 

If you’re easily offended or put off by off-color race comedy, then Wild Eye Releasing’s “Race War:  The Remake” DVD is not for you!  For me, and those like me, unaffected by the type of uncouth spoof, Tom Martino’s debut is for you!  The Raw & Extreme sublabel’s DVD is MPEG2 encoded, 720p resolution, on a DVD5.  Presented in widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio, there is a breadth of visual presentation not confined within’ pillar and letterboxing but is stretched vertically that affects the already par level resolution.  Guerilla filmmaking also involves no production lighting and natural lighting is more than used here in Martino’s run around the Houston area, but one thing good about Martino’s naturally lit cinematography is its neutral set, avoiding under and overexposure.  The lesser used interiors have some tint lighting and key lighting to avoid total flat, dark outcomes but give the image a haze of hue, especially inside Baking Soda’s living room scene in the first act that sees a thin layer of red and green.  The English PCM Stereo has inconsistencies in volume.  Some scenes discern quieter than others because of the guerilla filmmaking constraints as well as just using commercial recording equipment.  However, the dialogue does land well enough for the jokes to hit and overlayed sound effects greatly lift the sound design where needed, such as with the Mortal Kombat video game sequence or with the array-spray of gunshots throughout and soundboard gag effects.  There are no subtitles with this release.  Included in the special features is Tom Martino director’s commentary, a gag/blooper reel, a behind-the-scenes reel of the gory moments, and Wild Eye Releasing trailers that include “Race War:  The Remake.”    The clear, ECO-Light Amaray DVD case houses stellar covert art illustration work by Belgium graphic artist, Stemo, with the inlaid narrative intensity and characters in collage.  The reverse side includes a gory still from one of the scenes.  The disc is pressed with the same front cover image but there are no other physical materials.  The unrated DVD runs for 95 minutes and is region free.

Last Rites:  Wild Eye Releasing re-unleashes another outrageous title on their Raw & Extreme label and the Tom Martino film is every ounce of the sentiment in it’s indie underground hokum of gore, racism, homosexuality, and aliens! 

Get Caught Up in the Middle of a “Race War: The Rmeake” on DVD