EVIL Will Run You Over and Scrape You Off the Road Just to Kill You Again! “A Very Flattened Christmas” reviewed! (SRS Cinema / Blu-ray)

Merry Christmas, You Filthy Reindeers! “A Very Flattened Christmas” Blu-ray on Amazon.com!

A roadkill collection company mourns the sudden death of one of their former employees who was murdered in a seemingly drug deal gone bad. Max, also a former roadkill company employee, returns to town to pay his respects to his close friend and colleague but the funeral is everything but cordial and of decorum when Rick, another former roadkill company employee turned famous yet narcissistic filmmaker on the verge of releasing another installment of his popular Dick Puncher series, makes trouble not only at J’s funeral but also at the company’s Christmas party. Max’s friend, conspiracy theorist Dan, becomes lead suspect in J’s death, and detectives Bradley and Francine search for clues and interview those involved with the deceased. Soon, they and all other employees become intwined in all the roadkill company drama for all the wrong reasons when a killer dressed in a menacing reindeer outfit has set out to slay all employees, past and present, this Christmas.

Based on the Shane Wallace created six-episode comedy web series “Flattened,” premised with precursory characters Max, Dan, and J involved in roadkill company hijinks and drugs, Wallace’s feature length, Christmas holiday-themed, and company slasher film serves as a direct follow up to the web series filmed in and near Wichita, Kansas and released between 2016 and 2017. Titled “A Very Flattened Christmas,” the 2024 story continues the trio’s story, picking up years later after all the interned employees have moved on with their lives from scooping up animal carcasses from off the local highways and backroads and started different career pathways, such as becoming a highly famed filmmaker, and but their newfangled lives become jeopardize by an evil reindeer taking them out one-by-one. Different Day Pictures returns to produce the venture backed by crowdfunding through GoFundMe with film’s star Key Tawn Toothman serving as producer.

The returning web series cast carry little over from the series into the feature film other than selective series moments displayed in a snow globe during the credits, which doesn’t explain much if, like in myself, you’ve never seen, or even heard of, the web series, and the multiple mentioned fact that characters once worked at the roadkill company.  That’s about as much backstory you’ll get to catch up into a whole new venture for Max and gang that are no longer in the dirty business of carcass removal but are in the business of being preyed upon by a reindeer masked killer, a complete 180 degree turn of events from the comedic web series.  This particular Christmasy, slasher sequel follows Max (Key Tawn Toothman) having returned to town to attend his friend J’s (Naythan Smith) funeral.  Max’s grounded for social facets with level-headed awareness and a good sense of judgement making him well liked amongst current employees of the company but that also makes him an easy target for former employees turned narcissist filmmaker Rick (Jesse Bailey) and conspiracy theorist Dan (Trevor Vincent Farney) who clings on him with his paranoia drivel.  Between the two, Rick receives substantial backstory material with news story and commercial hype for his upcoming Dick Puncher film but receive little context to Dan’s rants and ravings that are more like an annoying friend’s unconscious conversational narcissism.  Max is balanced out by allies within the company like receptionist Jerry-Ann (Beckie Jenek) and mobile carcass scraper Lorribell (Paul Makar), both of him have to work on Christmas, begrudgingly, but all are fair game for Red Eyes (Lucas Farney) with a mangy Reindeer mask in a mall Santa suit killing off Max’s friends and enemies alike and while Max and his love interest Maddie (Kaemie McCanless) along with detectives Bradley (Mark D. Anderson) and Francine (Shanna Berry) work to uncover the truth, led on red herring, and fight for their own survival, the body count continues to collect those staple to the “Flattened” series, turning every character fair game to be trampled by the Reindeer masked killer.  Mark Mannette, John Doornbos, Noah Farney, Blaine Frazier, Nora Graham, and Dean Kavivya costar.

The Christmas season may be over and Santa has packed it in for another 364 days, but no Christmas horror movie, especially released during the season, should be left unturned over and “A Very Flattened Christmas” receives a platform as we continue to celebrate the 12-days of Christmas with a series-based slasher that concludes the “Flattened” troupe’s run by killing off its beloved characters.  “A Very Flattened Christmas” continues the campiness with a dry humor, dark comedy affair that plays like a family get together that has gone down the drain with rekindled friends and enemies swirled into a nutmeg batter of one maniacally, reindeer-and-Santa Claus-garbed killer’s cake mix.  The feature tiptoes ever so gradually away from the roadkill company despite keeping the series’ Flattened in the title as the chaos spills out into other portions of town without the whiff of decaying animal corpses; instead, the corpses of Max’s acquaintances are the ones who are being flattened, literally.  The masked killer has strong threat appeal and wields an array of offings in favor of the story as Wallace uses death gags and some practical effects to shoulder the horror weight but there’s also a fair amount of visual blood spurt’s that speak to its budget limitations and crowdfunded castrations.  The killer twist is palpable enough though leans into overt tells some but the one thing this themed slasher really needed, as much as it also needed more series context in the jump from a television show to a feature film, is to up the Christmas tinsel with seasonal carnage to turn the merriness on its head by decapitating it.

Keep the holiday spirit going with “A Very Flattened Christmas” on an SRS Cinema Blu-ray. The AVC encoded, 1080p resolution, 25 gigabyte BD-R offers a solid image quality under the technical low bar circumstances. Details are sharply outlined, distinct, and without fuzzy aliasing, splotchy spots, or other associated compression issues. There’s some banding along the darker shades but nothing too big to gripe about. The details are hit or miss depending on the scene difficulty and substandard lighting but the achievement of corporal tactiles on an SRS Cinema Blu-ray is a little triumph for the release and that is what is accomplished here. The full-blown animation portion is top-notch work for something of a skit gag that lands with confidence. The English language LPCM 2.0 has little authority behind it’s acoustical dynamics and projecting strength, but the dialogue is overall clear and present, ample and adequate by all means of the sound design without underscoring the horrific highlights of a holiday horror film, such as the hits and action of the evil reindeer’s sojourn slaughter through the Max’s rolodex of friends. Daron Kelp and Dave Baker’s eclectic soundtrack of rattling synth keyboard and haunting sustained chords peppered with full length vocal tracks. There are no subtitles available. Special features include a director and producer commentary track parallel to the feature, an alternate scene, deleted scenes, the film’s trailer, an animated trailer, “Flattened” series pilot episode, and other SRS Cinema trailers. The Amaray Blu-ray is about as physically scanty as they come with only an illustrated cover art of the Santa-cladded reindeer (looks like a rat to me) overtop and about to take hold a snowy covered town in its bloodied shovel grasp. SRS Cinema has always been able to produce neat art for their releases to bedazzle slightly the rudimentary in-hand. The not rated release has a runtime of 92 minutes and is region free unlocked.

Last Rites: Santa has packed it in for the year but in horror, Christmas can come at any time of year. “A Very Flattened Christmas” is a welcomed addition to the holiday clash subgenre with a formidable villain, decent kill decimating, and great soundtrack but be forewarned of its spotty at best storyline, some bad CGI bloodletting, and humorlessly dry jokes.

Merry Christmas, You Filthy Reindeers! “A Very Flattened Christmas” Blu-ray on Amazon.com!

The Holidays Are Over, but the EVIL Remains With Us in this Cookie-Cutter Classic “The Gingerdead Man” reviewed! (Full Moon Features / Blu-ray)

Get Ready to Chomp on this Cookie! “The Gingerdead Man” Blu-ray Available Here!

Cold-hearted, mama’s boy killer, Millard Findlemeyer, brutally gun downs Sarah Leigh’s father and brother before wounding during a diner robbery.  Two years later, Findlemeyer is executed with the help of Sarah’s damning testimony and the traumatized survivor attempts to pick up the pieces of her life by keeping her crumbling family bakery business afloat.  With her mother a raging alcoholic and a competing business threatening to shut the business down, Sarah doesn’t realize the gingerbread seasoning dropped off at her doorstep is actually the ashes of the evil Findlemeyer.  Thrown in a gingerbread mix and baked to live again, Findlemeyer returns to continue his carnage but as a delectably devilish cookie sporting candied buttons and wielding a knife.  Trapped inside the bakery, a handful of survivors are being more-than-gingerly picked off one-by-one by Findlemeyer’s possession of a pint-sized cookie and Sarah must face again the evil that destroyed her family.  

“The Gingerdead Man” is one of Full Moon’s more contemporary repeat villains this side of the century.  Christmas may be over, but the holiday cookie carnage doesn’t just pack on the pounds, it also can shred and cut the waist, literally, with guts spilling out everywhere.  The Charles Brand directed, 2005 film that kicked off the icing for not one, not two, but three sequels and a timeline intertwinement with Full Moon’s “Evil Bong” series.  Pot and cookies, a perfect combination when blazed.  The script was penned by Full Moon regular and “Night of the Living Dead” remake actor William Butler, under the pseudonym of Silvia St. Croix, and fellow Full Moon regular Dominic Muir (“Critters,” “Doll Graveyard”), under the pseudonym of August White.  Filmed in Los Angeles, the indie horror-comedy is a Shoot Productions and Full Moon coproduction venture with Band producing and Dana Harrloe serving as executive producer. 

Adding to “The Gingerdead Man’s already zany resurrecting the evil dead into a baked good concept (there’s nothing good about this cookie monster), the untamed energy and distinguished voiceover from Gary Busey is better than self-rising flour for this doughy production.  The “Predator 2” and “Lethal Weapon” actor headlines as the despicable killer Millard Findelmeyer but only in the flesh for the opening diner sequence that establishes Findelmeyer as a coldblooded murderer.  The backstory of his apprehension, trial, and execution is whisked into a frothy afterthought after the title credits to establish more of Robin Sydney’s Sarah Leigh character of rebuilding her life.  Sydney, who would become Charles Band’s wife nearly two decades later after debuting in this role, reserves Sarah into a stasis of plugging along into a woe-as-me state as a setup for her to be heroine nemesis to Findlemeyer’s flaky, killer crust.  What’s neat about her character, along with a handful of other principal characters, is they’re subtly and smartly named after notable cookie making companies.  Sarah Leigh is an obvious rework of the frozen desserts company Sara Lee, Ryan Locke, an unlikely Sarah Leigh love interest cladded and carried by all things from early 2000s, is Amos Cadbury, a mixed play on Famous Amos and Cadbury confectionary, and Jonathan Chase as commercial wrestling enthusiast Brick Fields lends to believe the character’s name pulls inspiration from Mrs. Fields soft baked cookies.  There’s also the corporate-commercial takeover statement with an adjacent restaurant that threatens to put Sarah’s bakery out of business and the owner’s name is Jimmy Dean, as in the sausage company, with Larry Cedar (“The Hidden,” “C.H.U.D. II”) in the role.  Alexia Aleman, Margaret Blye, Daniela Melgoza, and James Synder fill out the cast.

Kitschy personification horror is all the rage in the independent genre circle.  Murderous dolls at are dime a dozen, but a few outliers stray into something more risking and adventures, like an evil llama pinata in “Killer Pinata,” a wicked snowman in “Jack Frost,” or even a killer unicorn standing figure in “CarousHELL” that make the niche subgenre fascinatingly tacky for all the right reasons.  Charles Band and team tap into that peculiar ripe vein to extract their own usually joyous, kid-friendly object and transfigure its G-rated image to a hard R with death, sass, and a whole bunch of mischief and what better wholesome inanimate object to vilify than a scrumptious gingerbread man?  Voiced by Busey and animated by the always preferred practical means, “The Gingderdead Man” evokes promises of a so-bad-its-good composite, especially since the antagonist for this franchise starter fits right into the Full Moon small things come in killer packages niche, and while half of “The Gingerdead Man” delivers on a havoc-wreaking spiced cookie, the execution, as a whole, leaves much to be desired by whirling through a two year story gap of the capture and execution of Findlemeyer and how and why his malevolent essence is mixed into the batter for resurrection.  The slapdashedly before and after title credits causes a brief loss of thought as the brain frantically tries to catch up and fill in the gaps as much of the images and exposition haphazardly piece together.  The Gingerdead Man isn’t also quite as quippy as his human form counterpart, but a ton of appreciation goes into the multiple renditions of the distorted faced Gingerdead Man character from hand puppets, to animatronics, to full size human suit provides that breadth of range in angles, perspectives, and appearances that shape a personality package to where dialogue can nearly be neutralized altogether.  “The Gingerbread Man” lives and breathes as its marketed image, a mediocre kill possession-slasher with a bunch of characters scratching their heads instead of building upon who they are and what hurdles, figuratively and literally, to jump, the latter mostly falls into the hands of Sarah Leigh and her depression-induced fear, an aspect she has to face when being revisited by the man who killed her father and brother. 

An all-new transfer and remastered from the original 35mm elements, Full Moon Features re-bakes “The Gingerdead Man” onto a new physical media cookie sheet.  The AVC encoded, 1080p resolution, BD25, presented in a widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio, had elevated some lower resolution complications with better definition appeal but the overall package isn’t an epitome showcase of the format possibilities with softer contrasts that leaves voids and shadows milkier, textures fluctuate during decode that sways in a range between 15 to 25 Mbps, and minor damaged portions, such as light scratches and speckling, are not touched up in the restoration.  Skin tones and other colorist applications appear organic and, when reaching peak performance, displays a nicely diffused sweat sheen in the lighting.  Two English, lossy audio options are available, a Dolby Digital 5.1 and a Stereo 2.0.  A clean and clear presentation on all layers with an amalgamated cast that just as good as any other solid sound design with powerful forefront and intelligible dialogue, an above par ambient dispersal that has suitable depth and range, and a Roger Ballenger carnivalesque score that isn’t from Richard Band but is a great mimic.  English subtitles are available.  Extras include an archival behind-the-scenes featurette with interviews with cast, crew, and Charles Band with some BTS-footage in creating the cookie monster, a blooper reel, the original trailer, and trailers for other Full Moon features.  Front cover on the Amaray Blu-ray is an illustrated composition of characters that clue in a sense of what to expect but other than that, this standard re-release has physical bare bones.  The region free release has a runtime of 71 minute and is not rated.

Last Rites: Though doesn’t reinvent the recipe nor does it not make this naughty killer cookie stale, “The Gingerdead Man” has come a long way with a new, revitalizing release onto a high-definition format pulled from the extensive and vast Full Moon catalogue that’s slowly but surely updating the filmic cache. This schlocky bad baked good should surely be in everyone’s holiday horror collection.

Get Ready to Chomp on this Cookie! “The Gingerdead Man” Blu-ray Available Here!

The Jack-O-Lantern of EVIL Curses! “The Pumpkin Man” reviewed! (Scream Team Releasing / DVD)

Don’t Accidently Curse Yourself by Not Owning “The Pumpkin Man” on DVD!

The town of Cromwell lives and breathes off the demonic urban legend known as Pumpkin Man during the town’s full embracement of the Halloween season. College student Catherine, the town’s biggest savant of Pumpkin Man lore, has been given a tidbit of information of where to look for clues in discovering the lost book of spells that can summon the demon. After Catherine incantates the book’s passages, the frenetic young woman receives the intended reaction out of her friends, to scare the living daylights out of them with a legendary prank, but as true legend goes, those who read the words and summon Pumpkin Man back from the depths of Hell will become cursed to die by the demon’s elongated claws. Now, Catherine and her friends are haunted while they sleep, and their reality is twisted while awake as the Pumpkin Man toys with them until those who evoke his name is dead.

Halloween may be over, Thanksgiving too, but the spirit and the fear will always remain, especially when we all embark into the jolliest times of year.  There would be no shame in watching “The Pumpkin Man” while drinking hot cocoa and basking in the warm glow of your red, white, and green tree lights as you sit in the dark.  The glow of the television setup will keep you cozy and warm as a tall, pumpkin-headed demon literally rips the faces off cursed kids in director Ryan Sheets’ first feature-length film based off his short films series of the titular, iconic character.  Sheets’ inconspicuous indie franchise has spawned 5 short film sequels from the original 2016, 4-minute short, including a versus pitted against another Ryan Sheets’ regular character Kreepy the Clown.  Sheets cowrites the feature with Nick Romary, the original Pumpkin Man actor Jeff Rhodes, and his wife Janae Muchmore, pieced together by the central Florida team’s production company South Ridge Films with Sheets’ daytime colleague, fellow attorney Jason P. Herman, footing most of the bill as executive producer. 

Unlike the shorts, the feature features a whole new cast of carefully crafted victims for the demon to shake up and slaughter.  Even the Pumpkin Man himself is not played by Jeff Rhodes, who previous played the titular villain by more slasher-esque means with a butcher’s knife and a slow gait.  Instead, Ryan Sheets reimagines Pumpkin Head’s supernatural aesthetic and bearing by playing the demon gourd himself, in stilts, with less Michael Myers essence, and providing a proper name for the demon of Fall known as Kürbis.  The holiday spirited demon with a Cromwell history of whomever summons him will be cursed to die by him plagues a new set of fool-hearted conjurers nearly three centuries after a supposed Cromwell witch took her own life to stop the demon.  The film introduces the first-time principal role for Barbara Desa, a social media influencer and Orlando-based actress with a ton of a spunk, as Catherine Quinn, a quirky, Kürbis-obsessed Cromwell denizen with no real substantial motivation for finding the lost book of Kürbis other than to play a Halloween trick on her friends and be heedless to the consequential power it holds.  This makes Catherine dangerously unstable, and she feels more like a villain than the Pumpkin Head when irresponsibly meddling with something she truly doesn’t understand, compromising not only her own life but her friends too for fun at their expense.  The development of supporting characters outshines the simpleton needs of the principal Catherine as her friends, and outside the clique but stay in close proximity, find themselves having to make choice, such examples lie with Catherine’s best friend Jenny (“Stephanie Kirves) who chooses the demise of another just to save her own skin while Cather’s cop older brother Tim (Estaban Abanto) can’t ignore the gruesome facts of his little sister’s involvement in a couple of Cromwell murders and disappearances.  There’s also Michael (Matthew Beaton), a potential love-interest for Catherine being pulled from out of the friend zone and into more flirtatious foundations but is quickly blocked by the presence of Pumpkin Man’s uncanny ability to enter dreams and stir their existence into an unbalanced waking nightmare.  “The Pumpkin Man” rounds out with more local Floridian casting with Ariel Taylor, Krysti Reif, and Josh Rutgers.

This isn’t the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. “The Pumpkin Man” doesn’t start off super strong with a tattered accumulation of characters and backstory that barely carve out the shinier surface’s meatier pith that provides traces of sympathy and capability for situations and characters before the turning point turns dour.  Yet, if you stick around through “The Pumpkin Man’s” missteps, what you get is a progressively better reconstruction of a supernatural slasher that sees some decently gore-soaked effects for an independent production.  The added bonus being the cost-saving aspects of Sir Henry’s Haunted Trail, a Florida Halloween walk-through attraction that provides the spooky atmospherics and ghoulishly made-up cast of jump-scare actors as background or pop-in macabre aesthetics.  What starts as a demon resurrecting, potentially unleashing Hell on Earth represented by Halloween synecdoche, the story hits a turning point and switches gears toward slasher properties that work more ideally with a Freddy Krueger inspired killer, embodying the spirit of Halloween in a different and welcoming way than other Samhain-centric killers with a high seasonal watch repeat and an unforgettable antagonist.

Scream Team Releasing shows what happens when the pumpkin smashes back in “The Pumpkin Man” on DVD home video.  Presented in a widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio, the MPEG2, upscaled 1080p, single-layered DVD5 has lower image resolution because of the single layer compression that’s encoded with not only the feature but also a fair amount of bonus pumpkin batch content.  Black areas are not as clean and void with some noticeable posterization, details and overall picture crispness are not as sharp with a smoother contour between interior and exterior scenes, and coloring is often muted with missed opportunities for a punchier palette as the cinematography is completely ungraded, appearing as mostly raw, jittery footage underneath a more dynamic audio layer.  The lossless English Dolby Digital 2.0 stereo levels range from an anemic muffled to just at the edge of overextending the audio capacity but keep in line for better precision.  The diverse band soundtrack livens up downtime sequences to evoke a Halloween and rock or rockabilly mood and the sound design digs into the atmospherics with bug chirps, floorboard creaks, clock ticks, and the intertwinement of the brief ominous minor keys.  Dialogue is clean and clear, but Pumpkin Head’s post-added dialogue doesn’t ride parallel to the actor’s which is slightly isolated and boxy but is not terribly sync to make an audible make-or-break difference.  Extras include a director’s feature accompanying audio commentary with Ryan Sheets, a making-of featurette Carving a PumpkinTales from the Book of Kürbis an 8-part short horror anthological series directed by Ryan Sheets, and two trailers.  The DVD comes with a Casey Booth designed cover art that’s yells diabolical autumn harvest with a disc pressed with a more traditional, evil-cut pumpkin head overtop the orange-colored, rough-carved, and spikey “The Pumpkin Man’ font.  The not rated DVD has a runtime of 91 minutes and is region free for all.

Last Rites: Could “The Pumpkin Man” be worth exploring deeper into the mythos? After many successful short films in the last decade, Ryan Sheets has perfected the formula for his own temporal-traversing, gourd-headed demon and with a little more refining and stamina, we wouldn’t mind seeing “The Pumpkin Man” more on screen, or in our nightmares.

Don’t Accidently Curse Yourself by Not Owning “The Pumpkin Man” on DVD!

Happy, EVIL Halloween, Halloween, Halloween. Happy, EVIL Halloween, Silver Shamrock! “Halloween III: Season of the Witch” reviewed! (Via Vision / Limited Edition Blu-ray)

“Halloween III: Season of the Witch” Available on Limited Edition Blu-ray from Via Vision!

Just days before Halloween, a man stumbles hurt and delusional rantings into the hospital of Dr. Daniel Challis.  Clutching a Halloween mask to his chest, Challis figures the man to be crazy before stabilizing his vitals for rest but when the man is heinously murdered in his hospital room and the murderer burns himself alive in the hospital parking lot, Dr. Challis doesn’t know now what to make of the man’s rantings about something or someone is going to kill us all.  In walks Ellie Grimbridge, the man’s daughter, who has been investigating her father’s mysterious death.  Intrigued not only by the case, but also by the lovely Ellie, Dr. Challis and Ellie’s investigative work leads them to the Silver Shamrock mask factory in Santa Mira, the same mask factory that created the mask Ellie’s father was clutching before he died.  What they uncover is a plot of sacrifice on Halloween night, spearheaded by an Irish toy maker in Conal Cochran.

With a novel concept in the hands of one of horror’s most promising filmmakers, John Carpenter, a script penned by an uncredited yet famed British science fiction writer in Nigel Kneale and touched up by Carpenter, and a young Carpenter protégé, Tommy Lee Wallace, at the helm, “Halloween III” attempted to be an off-the-beaten path of success new story for what would have an annual Halloween-themed anthology going forward.  Unfortunately, and regrettable, “Halloween III:  Season of the Witch” failed to connect with an audiences and Michael Myer fanboys too stubborn to let go of The Shape.  It wasn’t until years later that the 1982 feature, released on the coattails of 1981’s part II of the original Michael Myers saga, found footing with fans who now appreciate the unique story, its practical effects, and the bold, yet defunct, vision Carpenter and crew once envisioned.  Carpenter and Debra Hill returned to produce, alongside Joseph Wolf, Irwin Yablans, and Barry Bernadi, with Universal Pictures as the backing studio. 

Now, “Season of the Witch” just didn’t star a bunch of nobodies in this offshoot of a newly branded “Halloween” concept.  Before playing the quasi-alcoholic, deadbeat father Dr. Challis, Tom Atkins was already a rising star in the land of John Carpenter films with “The Fog” and “Escape from New York” In 1980 and 1981.  Atkins’s usual confident and charming qualities underneath the rugged good looks and trimmed mustache serve him the better part of man doing his bit part in a not-his-business investigation of a man’s death to please a good-looking woman that happens to be the dead man’s daughter.  That good-looking woman is Ellie Grimbridge, embodied by the Mad Magazine Production’s “Up the Academy’s” Stacey Nelkin, and if you blink, you might miss Atkin’s Dr. Challis being perhaps the worst father ever to his two children and ex-wife.  The subplot is so subtle and overshadowed by the Silver Shamrock Halloween plot that being invested in the crumbling family dynamics doesn’t even hold substantial weight and it truly works to subvert the subconscious and plant a destructive pipe bomb smartly into your moral compass because if you think Dr. Challis is the hero of the story, which in many perspectives he is, he’s also doesn’t keep up with his own children interests or current events, numerously bails on their planned care, runs off and sleeps with a much younger woman he hardly knows, is an active alcoholic, and is quite the handsy philanderer at that when he grabs his much older nurse’s bottom in a playful moment.  No, Dr. Challis is every ounce an antihero hidden in plain sight and in the guise of a potential savior of the children, the world, as he takes on Silver Shamrock and its founder, an Irish toymaker named Conal Cochran with tremendous evil genius and mastermind appeal by Dan O’Herlihy (“The Last Starfighter”).  “Halloween III:  Season of the Witch” rounds out the cast with Ralph Strait, Jadeen Barbor, Al Berry, Michael Currie, Garn Stephens and Essex Smith in key support roles.

Lots of previous opinionated chatter surrounding “Halloween III” collectively concludes to if the filmmakers decided to title the film anything else, maybe just the tagline of “Season of the Witch,” then the film would have won over audiences with a fresh take of science fictional horror and would not have been wrongfully panned by critics and moviegoers.  I call BS on this take.  The original intention was to deliver a new, Halloween-themed horror film year-after-year with John Carpenter attached in some way, shape, or form of bringing novelty terror to our eyeballs and brain.  Instead, public persuasion and studio submissiveness rendered the concept powerless and as a result, and no disrespect to any Michael Myers films that followed, was the departure of John Carpenter and Debra Hill and a string of mediocre and wacky Michael Myer sequels that went deep off the far end.  “Season of Witch” is not a teeny bit at all slasheresque, separating itself far from Michael Myers as much as possible by unconfining itself from location concentration by expanding the threat domestically, if not globally, with a parlor trick plot that involves special, laser-shooting masks that make kids’ heads melt into glop of crickets, snakes, and other creepy-crawly sui generis of the animal kingdom.  While strange in the cause and effect, the practical effects and superimposed visuals work to convey some taught gore and prosthetic knots that can be unraveled, even retrospectively critiquing them by today’s standards.  Wallace masters the film while, at the same time, hitting the ground running on his debut feature that has a look and feel of a graduate from the film of the John Carpenter. 

Halloween season may be months away, but Christmas comes early with Via Vision’s limited-edition Blu-ray set of “Halloween III: Season of the Witch.” The AVC encoded, high-definition 1080p, BD50 presents the film in a widescreen aspect ratio 2.35:1. Much like the Via Vision’s companion release with “Halloween II,” “Season of the Witch” mirrors the same resolution picture quality and stellar package presentation. Dean Cundey’s delivers another smoky noir realism that definably hard-edged and hard-lit that while isn’t the most colorful contrast it does create an abundance of inky shadow to lost in and sink into. A cleaner picture does bring with a reveal of how obsolete some of the composite matte effects but, simultaneously, revives what once was, nostalgia and a more tactile truth in movie magic. Details come through within contour delineation and textural elements. The English language DTS-HD Master Audio 2.0 has dual channel balance and strength with lossless fidelity. Dialogue retains saliency throughout from a rather middle-of-the-road strength ambience albeit a wide range of effects from explosions to laser beam bursts and its constructed, catchy Silver Shamrock jingle, often muted through the television programming, and John Carpenter’s and Alan Howath’s synth collaboration that’s tonally reminiscent of previous “Halloween” films but stands by itself in distinct measure to garner new-sound tension. English subtitles are optionally available. Also, like Via Vision’s “Halloween II” Blu-ray release, a 2024 commentary is recorded and encoded with film critic/historian Lee Gambin and a special appearance by “The Howling” director Joe Dante. Archival commentaries from Tommy Lee Wallace and Tom Atkins are also on the disc with all three commentaries in the setup menu. Special features content includes 2012 Scream Factory-Red Shirt productions with Stand Alone: The Making of Halloween III: Season of the Witch documentary surrounding a Micheal Myers-less picture, it’s critical shockwave, and its ultimate cult following and Horror’s Hallowed Grounds: Revisiting the Original Shooting Locations hosted by Sean Clark visiting a few of the locations used for the film. A still gallery, theatrical trailer, and television spots round out the rest. Of course, my favorite part is the lenticular cover on the limited-edition and numbered cardboard sleeve case of the three, silhouetted little trick-or-treaters with a crone-ish face coming down from above the fire red dusk sky. The slightly thicker Blu-ray Amaray case cover art is stark still image from the movie with another, different image on the reverse side. The black background disc has the skull mask and title across from each other in nice compositional juxtaposition. Next to the Amary case is an envelope with 6 art (picture) cards taken from the film. The Via Vision release is rated M for Mature for moderate violence and moderate coarse language, has a runtime of 109 minutes, and has region B playback only.

Last Rites: Who knew being the outcast looked so damn good. “Halloween III: Season of the Witch” deserved better and received the best on this Australian, limited-edition, lenticular Blu-ray set that’ll leave you whistling the Silver Shamrock jingle and fearing Halloween masks more than ever.

“Halloween III: Season of the Witch” Available on Limited Edition Blu-ray from Via Vision!

This Little Pit Stop of EVIL Doesn’t Have Gumdrops and Lollipops. “Candy Land” reviewed! (MVD Visual / Blu-ray)

Visit “Candy Land” On Blu-ray. Purchase Here!

Candy Land is the bestowed designation of a truck stop at one of the last exits through Bible Belt country.  The monikered hotspot is home to four prostitutes, Sadie, Riley, Levi, and Liv, who work for ends meet, servicing all the needs of commercial truckers, those passing through, and even the local sheriff as long as they can cough up the cash.  The only ones not seeking pitstop sex worker services at Candy Land is a religious cult trying to spread the world of the lord around the same stretch of space.  When one of the members, a young and naïve Remy, shows up ostracized from the zealot sect, the sex workers take her in, treat her with kindness, and convince her to be worked into their profession.  Shortly after, gruesomely murdered bodies are found in and around the truck stop turning the once desired Candy Land into a life-threatening place to work, and enlightening the lot lizards that Candy Land is more seedy than once believed.

Shot in the foreground of the scenic Montana mountains, John Swab’s “Candy Land” is a lewd offering that screams the ugly part of something beautiful.  The 2022 USA horror-thriller is a written-and-directed by the “Run with the Hunted” and “Body Brokers” filmmaker Swab in the director’s first go at fringe horror that involves sex work, crazy cults, and hidden knife sheathed inside a large wooden cross.  Swab’s script takes a path less trodden perspective to most similar narratives and pulls inspiration heavily from the 70’s grindhouse era with lots of skin and lots of blood.  Swab produces his own film alongside fellow “Run with the Hunted” and “Body Brokers” producer Jeremy Rosen (“I Am Fear”), with Robert Ogden Barnum (“31”) and Michael Reiser (“Abandoned”) as executive producers, under the production banner of Roxwell Films.

The ensemble cast is comprised of Hollywood veterans, up-and-coming actors, and even a famous last name.  The latter would be then 29-year-old Eden Brolin, daughter of Josh Brolin (“No Country for Old Men”) and granddaughter of James Brolin (“The Amityville Horror”), who is quickly paving her own path having landed as a season regular on the widely popular modern western series “Yellowstone.”  The “Blood Bound” actress is joined by equally young and hungry talent of Sam Quartin, a multi-time John Swab collaborator with roles in “Run with the Hunted” and “Body Brokers,” Virginia Rand (“I Am Fear”), and Owen Campbell (“X”) who are definitely not shy showing of their bodies, simulating explicit sex acts, and step into a compromising prostitute’s shoes as “Candy Land’s” unashamed lot lizards, or that’s what they portray for their characters on screen.  Together, a bond is formed between the working stiffs of sex workers, leaning on each other for support while seemingly living a free and uninhibited life with a good chunk of change in their pocket, but their profession is no walk in the truck lot as taxing moments in sidestepped affairs of the main plot show the darker side of prostitution, mostly involving Owen Campbell’s Levi as a straight man willing to anything for cash in a male dominated over-the-road trucking industry.  Their chimera’s end of the beginning is when Remy strolls into their lives like a lost puppy.  “It Follows’” Olivia Luccardi plays the meek and underestimated cult girl turning tricks as a way get a foot-in the door to cleanse damned souls to send to Gods’ pearly gates in Heaven and while Luccardi has the substantial feign madness well set in her eyes and actions, her story slips below that of the original four truck stop hookers as much of Luccardi’s backstory or even her perpetual motion through her perspective loses to the arbitrary wanes of killing for the sake of killing when the chance is at hand.  Cast rounds out with Guinevere Turner (“American Psycho”), Brad Carter (“The Devil to Pay”), Bruce Davis (“Agnes”), Billy Blair (“What Josiah Saw”), Mark Ward, and another famous last name from William Baldwin (“Flatliners”) as the daunting, downlow Sheriff Rex who has a strong, affectionate thing for Levi. 

The very first opening scene and montage of a sandy-blond Sadie going truck-to-school bus-to-bathroom stall to give a sense of what to expect and the down-and-dirty daily workload for our principal prostitutes sets the tone of Swab’s lickerish thriller with grindhouse endowments.  “Candy Land” is more than just a nutso cult film with all the hallmarks of sordidness as the interpretation received from the story is this temporariness in these characters’ lives.  From the transient paying clients of a truck stop, to living in the impermanence of a hotel room, to even the things they ingest, such as the smoke of incessant drags of cigarettes as a brief coping mechanism and the food they eat with the Hostess Snowballs that have fleeting substance in them to stave off hunger for a little while and only provide negligible nutrition, the temporarily speaks volumes toward the plot of a killer under the influence of a radicalized cleansed ideology wasting away those in provisional moments.  Swab finely sets up character quirks, an unsavory, realistic world, and distinct dynamics to enmesh the characters in a life they attempt to put a pretty face on only that pretty face is a pig wearing lipstick, forcing them into uncertainty and wearing them down to a point they can’t face what’s important and dangerous right in front of them – a young, confused girl led astray and looking for answers.  Instead, that girl, teetering on the edge of purity and dissolution having nowhere to call home, is not safeguarded and is folded into their own licentious lives and, like a Trojan horse, she ultimately become their downfall. 

For “Candy Land’s” inaugural home video release, VMI Distribution and MVD Visual releases the John Swab horror onto Blu-ray.  The AVC encoded, high definition 1080p, BD25 conscripts not a single compression issue in the breathtaking, mountainous landscapes of Montana, affixing great distance between Candy Land and the rest of the world to describe the troubled brief getaway from reality without actually saying it. Presented in a widescreen 1.78:1 aspect ratio, details are greatly appreciated here with the graphic and vulgar markings inside the restrooms, skin tones fair a natural coloring, and a good amount of the whole film is lit naturally with the occasional greenish-yellow gel work to enhance the dinginess of a seedy truck stop. The English language, lossy Dolby Digital 5.1 surround track settles the best fidelity that it can muster, reining in unbridled tracks for a more subdued approach that befits more the lowkey motel suspenser than a fueled high-rise stimulator. Dialogue is clean and clear enough; a few instances cause for mumbling concern but quickly pass and that link is quickly made in the off word that’s missed. Soundtrack contains well-blended, well-intermingled snippets of classic rock, alternative and R&B from the 90s, and a quaint Christmas selection. Yes, “Candy Land” could be considered a Christmas movie! English subtitles are optionally available. Special features are limited by the disc capacity that houses only John Swab’s commentary track and retroesque, in-character stills of a digital zine. The standard Blu-ray Amaray snapper case for this limited-edition release is nothing short of pedestrian with a homage cover art that, I must admit, made me suspect Candy Land” was more a vampire film than a cultist’ coup of truck stop sex workers because of my lack of doing any kind of film prep for any of the screeners I receive – keeps me objectively aligned. You’ll find the same image pressed on the disc itself with no insert accompanying. Not rated and locked on a region A playback, this release has the film clocked in at 93 minutes.

Last Rites: “Candy Land’s” sweetness derives from its in-your-face sexual audacity that rings a certain truth inside the unsavory cash-making aspects of the oldest profession and Swab takes us out from the game’s usual vivarium of the darkened streets and the dingy underpasses into the brightly lit and very populated desert with a different breed of the species. The instilled cult angle feels more slapdash in comparison that sunders the acts more acutely and without a clear reason, leaving the finale unsatisfactory like a $20 handy.

Visit “Candy Land” On Blu-ray. Purchase Here!