The House that Holds Evil! “Slasher House” review!

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Here is an entertaining little piece of UK slasher horror that will sure be appreciated as well as thrilling. “Slasher House” had finished filming and was wrapped up in a nice bow two years ago but, finally, made an appearance on DVD just last year in the UK. A whole another year later and “Slasher House” hits retail shelves this past Tuesday in the States – about damn time – courtesy of Sector 5 Films. In all honestly, the good old USA missed out on releasing “Slasher House” as this English film’s crew and cast were the highlights of turning a run of the mill survival film into a great little unknown gem of a movie.

Red wakes up stark naked in a cell of a grungy rundown prison. Plagued with amnesia, she can’t remember who she is let alone how she how she got here. When her cell door opens up, Red discovers she isn’t alone as their other captives, but these captives are not so innocent. Within these iron bars and walls, she is trapped with notorious serial killers who are being released from the cells one by one. With no way out in sight, Red must elude the killers as they hunt for her in the corridors. There are more sinister means behind this game, but she must go through the players first to find out why she’s here and who she really is.
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Leading lady Eleanor James was labeled one of Britain’s new age scream queens. Though she delivers no real scream here in “Slasher House,” James’ character resembles more of Milla Jovovich’s Alice character in the Resident Evil series – more so with the red dress, calm demeanor, and feistiness with less kung fu, ESP abilities. Her performance as Red has you rooting for her all the way because she is the first and last “last girl” in “Slasher House” against a handful of murderous sonuvabitches.
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Each notorious slasher has a trademark and a unique personality – a child killer, an operator, a brute, a dual personality – leaving no room for boring characters. Their backstories are briefly told in a flashback anecdote just short enough to give you their whole persona. The plot is a bit more complex than it’s unique cast of characters. I like the idea of bringing a lineup of serial killer allstars into a dirty old prison and letting them face off. I wish there was more of that. Half of “Slasher House” was trying to find an exit and the other half was escaping the maniacs. No real dull moments plagued the film, but with a premise that involves a battle royal amongst the worst of the worst, you would think you’d be up against a blood spattered wall and heads would be constantly rolling. The other half of my mind says the slowed down story goes better with a film like this to build the characters up for a great and glorious downfall.
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“Slasher House” plays out like a graphic novel and could be well turned into one. A great one in fact. “Slasher House” also delivers a twist ending that you won’t see coming until the very end! Speaking of the movie’s end, the open ending doesn’t explain much to the character’s situation. One could only guess to the purpose behind the game, but none of the plans are plainly explained.
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“Slasher House” is a must buy from Sector 5 Films. Two years have I waited for a film like this that could entertain me on a budget while pulling off major production status. I’m very impressed by director MJ Dixon and his vision and his future is bright with indie pictures and possibly get a gig in Hollywood if he keeps turning out good films. If you have a fear of clowns you may want to stay away; other than that, pick this DVD up that was released this past Tuesday the 26th!

Free your fears: F.E.A.R. online coming to Steam

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Alma is back and it is time to fear her once again. Yes, F.E.A.R. online is finally coming to Steam after it’s long ass beta test on areia games. For people who don’t know what F.E.A.R. is, it is an extremely kick ass first person horror game with the first one being released back in 2005 on XBOX 360 and Playstation 3. The series has spawned two sequels and now a free to play spin off is on its way to Steam this fall. It will be free and will feature both a co-op campaign and competitive multiplayer. I know I will be playing it the day it comes out and give a review of the game since my happy ass loves the F.E.A.R. games to death. F.E.A.R. Online has a scheduled release date for October 17.

A Serbian Film: The most shocking film out there?

(Above) Srdjan Todorovic

(Above) Srdjan Todorovic

This 2010 film is brought to us by Srdjan Spasojevic and will shock even the most hard-core of horror fans. The main character is a man named Milos (Srdan Todorovic) who is a retired porn star struggling in the cash department. When he is offered a job that will change his financial status he takes it. He believes he is going to be the star of a reality based pornographic art film but is instead projected into a twisted sexual world of snuff films. Right from the get-go things are creepy, with the first shoot taking place in an abandoned children’s hospital. He decides to leave the shoot after being shown a clip of a new-born infant being penetrated. The director alarmingly calls this new-born porn.  However, Milos is too late, after waking up with no memory he soon realises he has done sick things unconsciously. The film goes on to show viewers horrific scenes throughout. During one scene a woman gives birth on-screen rather graphically. She is assisted by a big bald man and the baby is pushed out and into his hands. He then proceeds to pull down his underwear and rape the screaming new-born. Another scene shows a man who has been injected with large doses of a powerful sexual stimulant. He is anally raping  his own young child – who is bleeding  profusely from his anus. This film grotesquely covers multiple taboo subjects; numerous types of rape, incest, new-born porn, pedophilia, necrophilia and more. All this and still this film is audaciously considered art to some people. This is without a doubt the most shocking film to exist, I have never heard of one worse. Although you must create your own opinion about this film I would not recommend it to anyone. I have no idea of the long-term effects of trauma but I’m sure everyone would prefer to avoid flashbacks of this!

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“I Saw The Devil” and “I Know What You Did Last Summer” on the Remake/Reboot Chopping block!

Just when you think it’s safe to go back into the theater, another remake and reboot news bit rears it’s ugly little head. Two pieces of news bits delivered today spilling the beans that “I Saw The Devil” and “I Know What You Did Last Summer” will be being redone for a second time around.
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“Oculus” director Mike Flanagan is in reports to write and produce the “I Know What You Did Last Summer” reboot which the story is based off a Lois Duncan novel. My question is why remake reboot this at all? This film, starring a gorgeous Jennifer Love Hewitt, was a major success in the wake of Wes Craven slasher game changer Scream back in 1997 and then spawn two more not-so-successful sequels. The story revolves around a group of teens who accidentally kill someone and then are hunted down by a man with a hook afterwards.
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Kim Jee-woon’s “I Saw The Devil” is the other film that made remake headlines today in which Adam Wingard and Simon Barrett will bring the film to life…in America I’m sure. Wingard is set to helm and Barrett will be penning the project about the fiance of a special unit cop being murdered by a vicious psychopath. Hellbent on revenge, the cop is determined to hunt down the killer no matter the cost and the line between good and evil are sub-sequential. I’m a fan of Wingard and his style of horror and thrills, but I’m not so keen on remaking foreign movies for American audiences for the sake of those who can’t stand to read subtitles and this kind of situation just screams that instance.

No word on any dates yet, but I’ll keep my eyes open and see what comes across my desk.

Get Into the Evil Spirit! Varsity Blood review!

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A small town pack of football jocks and cheerleaders with a dark secret spend Halloween night at a rundown farmhouse to party until dawn, but a sadistic killer in the school mascot uniform hunts them down one by one. Now their only chance of survival is to rely on each other, but will their dark secret get the better of them?

“Varsity Blood” tries to home in on the slasher saturated 80’s decade and, more or less, hits the mark right on the head with quick quip dialogue, teen angst, nudity, and blood. The killer garnishes a costume, even if the costume is the school mascot of a goofy tribal warrior, but the warrior outfit is simple, dark, and, like aforementioned, tribal which already gives it a ominous feel. Like most iconic slasher movie killers, they all have to brand a signature weapon – Jason had his machete, Myers had his knife, Leatherface had his chainsaw. The Warrier had his axe. Not too many killers carry an axe as a signature weapon and the axe is not overused as the Warrior does implement various methods of death.
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What about the teen group of various mannered jocks, cheerleaders, and other high school patrons of “Varsity Blood?” Like I said before, there is plenty of teen angst – jock wants sex badly, girl is major slut, fat girl tries to prove herself, lots of crying – so there lies enough teenage drama to make white and black pimples to form on your face. Some characters, like the main female lead Hannah (Lexi Giovagnoli) and good-girl Heather (Elyse Bigler), receive good character background, some of the cast are just fillers for the killer to dice up and their deaths become less important and severely fall short of a sympathetic death.

The whole reason why the killer kills is a bit of a joke too. I’m not going to go into more detail, but lets just say that there is an agreement and the one’s side terms are a bit too lame for my liking. The other side has an legitimate excuse for making these teen hooligans into mince meat. I do mean ‘hooligans’ too as the teens don’t learn from their historical depravities that resulted into a terrible accident that they’ll never forget. The past always catches up with them and the warrior makes sure of that.
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Didn’t I mention nudity earlier? You would think nudity would run rampant in a film about cheerleaders getting hacked to bits. Unfortunately, we’re teased to no end as Natalie Peyton and Elle LaMont give nothing but a tease show with covered nudity and bra and panties. However, not all is a total loss. Taylor Moessinger does do a strip show dance and goes topless and you can read my short review of her scenes here.
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The death scenes were relatively tame for a slasher that is suppose to homage the greats, but these deaths weren’t necessarily terrible either. There is great use of practical effects that are pulled off with excellent angle work with the camera and use of camera placement. I’ll give that to Jake Helgren, you might remember from my review of “Bloody Homecoming”, another high school slasher with the same vein.
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Give “Varsity Blood” a try and see how it fits. Room for growth and improvement with the director Helgren, a promising career for sexy leading lady Lexi Giovagnoli, and a great topless scene from the spirited, free loving, always naked model Taylor Moessinger. “Varsity Blood” is now available to own on DVD and VOD from Image Entertainment.